this has been one of the hardest lessons for me. ever since i was little i've had a problem holding grudges. i just graduated high school, and i can tell you every mean thing anyone has ever said or done to me, who they were, when it was, etc since the 1st grade! i've just never been able to let things go. it's like the story lucinda tells on the tape about the guy who was angry at his 3rd grade teacher for 30 years. i don't want to let it get that bad!
does anyone have any advice as to how i can just let go of all the anger and resentment i'm harboring?

I realized this too. I kept thinking really what good is it doing for me? it was not doing anything good or positive, so I needed to clean house and rid of it. I rather hold on to the good, fun memories as they make me feel good, safe, loved and sack the dead weight that made me feel bad, unintelligent, unworthy to the curbside. After all, the bad stuff was not going to help me gain anything in life, it was not going to help me be happy. I rather just leave it and walk away, it was in the past. I am NOT my past, it does not define me NOW! I am ME now, I am in the present NOW and that past negative stuff does no one justice!

It is house cleaning...out with the bad and hang on to all that is good.

Hi Cole,

I can realate to what you are saying about holding on and I MEAN HOLDING ON TO PAST HURTS AND WHAT OTHER PEOPLE DID TO US OR HOW TERRIBLE THEY MADE US FEEL. I had alot of past hurts that I kept with me for almost 20 years or more. As I went through the program I realized how ridiculous my holding on to these hurts all these years were only making me feel bad about myself, giving me a low self esteem, feeling of worthlessness, making me depressed, and asking myself why was I ever treated that way.

I decided to LET IT GO and FORGIVE EVERYONE THAT EVER TREATED ME BADLY. Because if you would ever meet any of those people today that would never remember how they ever treated you WAY BACK WHEN. So why waste your precious present moments holding on to those memories. LET THEM GO AND GET ON WITH YOUR LIFE. Love yourself UNCONDITIONALLY no matter what anyone says or thinks about you. I have a great attitude today I stand up for myself, I love myself, and I don't really care what other people think of me that's their problem if they want to be unfriendly.

STAND UP FOR YOURSELF!! AND BE THE BEST PERSON YOU WERE MEANT TO BE!!

To your success,

Dona Dry

Hi, how do you just let it go? I have a very hard time in letting go of all angers. I feel I need to take small steps by writing down a particular anger. I don't understand the next step of letting go. I need some guidance.

One of the things that really helped me out in this was the realization that letting something go isn't about letting someone else off the hook. Don't think that you have to let go of past hurt for someone else: you let it go because it's good for YOU. Yep, you. You do it for YOU- so that you can give yourself permission to feel better. Let go of the anger because anger hurts you, and you deserve better than that.

It really is all about you.

Hope this helps.
hugs!
Lorena

Don Henley wrote a song, I think called Forgiveness, but a verse from that song goes, "You keep carrying that anger, it will eat you up inside, baby"--that is so true, repressed anger causes all sorts of health issues, not to mention a negative mindset. It is hard to be a happy and positive person when you harbor resentments year after year. I am on the other side of that now and it was one of the toughest things to do, forgive those who have caused you misery--and I am sure many of those individuals wouldn't have a clue that I felt that way--I used to be so overly sensitive because of a poor self-image. It is such freedom to not feel that way any longer and to understand the origins of those feelings to begin with. I know I sound like a broken record, but this program gives you such a wealth of information to help you through the anxiety disorder.

Cynthia