Hi everybody, when I thought I was feeling better, and kind of like myself again, now I feel depressed, anxious, and very sad. I'm currently on session 6 and I felt that I was doing great I was feeling much better, no depression and the anxiety was almost gone from what I can say. But just minutes ago one of my best friends just left the house she came to visit after work and well we started talking and she ask me how was I doing, she did not know very well the nightmare I've been through for the past 7 months, so I told her everything, I gave her detail of what a panic attack is like, of what depression feels like and how ugly the anxiety is like. Well the point here is that my husband was there and while I was telling her everything, remembering, on the inside I was hurting, I could felt the pain inside me, in my chest and in my thoat, and all my husband did was just laugh, and laugh. So now I feel miserable because I feel like he has not learned anything from this experience. And I feel like he would never undertand the way I feel, and this makes me feel so bad...
Sorry for making this too long, and I also hope that those of you who read it, would understand what I am trying to say here..
love, Valeria.

Hi there,
I think that anxiety and depression is something that is hard for others to understand, and unless a person has experienced it for themselves how could they understand it.I feel that your husband laughing at your explanation is his way of covering up his insecurity, after all he knows you as an anxious and depressed person, so who would you be and what would happen to him if you changed. Sometimes life pushes us to change and your courage in starting the program and making positive changes in your life may affect your relationship..........ask him why he laughed and hopefully you can both learn something about each other and grow together or perhaps he is just afraid to express himself and laughing at you takes the light of him. be honest with him and tell him how his laughing at you affected you. also look into your own memory and find a time in the past when someone else laughed at you, and perhaps you will not be affected by your husband laughing....... remember one thing laughing is good medicine.so laugh at yourself and dont worry about anyone else....... i myself am only at the second week so i am looking forward to getting to week six like you so hang in there and be there for me and lets keep each other laughing........love light and laughter

Valeria, your discomfort is certainly understandable. When someone finds that much humor in our suffering, who wouldn’t feel discounted? Depression and anxiety are not funny. Comedians have used the topic for laughs for as long as there’ve been comedians, and that kind of humor we enjoy because it’s good natured and includes everyone. I agree 100% with Storyteller. Perhaps your husband’s laughter is a form of his own anxious feelings about your condition. Your explanation to your friend may have been so overwhelming, he might have needed to find humor for himself, because obviously your condition is something even he cannot fix. When we feel powerless, laughter gives release to that feeling of being without power. That’s why this topic works so well for comedians. However, take Storyteller’s excellent advice. If I were in your place I would have a conversation with him and let him know his reaction caused me suffering. I would not accuse. That’ll only stir up defenses. I’d say, “When you laughed, I suffered. One of these days all this will be behind me, but until then, please understand there is no humor here for me. I know you don’t want me to suffer. I know you didn’t mean to harm me.” And then I’d hug him for listening and caring enough to listen.

Early last year, when my depression was at its worse, I did try to explain my experience to a few people. Their responses were mixed. Most often, the response was wide eyed fear , followed by those people retreating as fast as they could move their feet. I haven’t seen them since. Depression can be temporarily contagious, because our negativity and gloom brings others down. People sense that temporary low, and they don’t like it, so they flee, or they might even laugh . At least when they are laughing, they are still present.

All these responses are spot on to what I feel. I don't think, I'd hope at least, that your husband is just feeling scared and upset with himself. It's hard for people to know of someone close to them going through a hard time or something as difficult as depression/anxiety and not be able to help them.

A guy that I am currently dating began pushing me away after a few months because he was afraid of how close we were becoming and him being afraid of those feelings. The only issue was, he didnt actual say that. He lied to me and turned it around on me. It hurt, badly. It brought back awful memories and it crushed me.

I have not felt this good in years with someone else, and for him to tell me, he doesnt really care about me and that, he's not good enough. It sent me into panic mode and my mind flew. Negative thoughts, anxiety attacks and nerves were going a million miles a minute. Even now, Im ice cold thinking of that night.

But, we talked. I told him why it hurt me. How it hurt me. Hopefully, he will learn from that and remember to watch his words/reactions.

We are in a very fragile and vurnerable state of mind. I hope you guys talk it out and that he respects how you feel.

Keep your hope strong and keep going!!! You are getting there!

Oh, and its great you talked to your girlfriend about it! Friends can be a strong support! :-)All the best.