Anger is a healthy and natural reaction to the stress you've been under. But when your anger starts destroying relationships with people you care about, it's not healthy anymore. Or maybe a better way to say it is that you aren't expressing it in a healthy way. Lashing out at people is not healthy. Crying, beating pillows against the bed, screaming into a pillow, exercising, writing letters you don't send - all of these are ways you can get that energy out without hurting yourself or anyone else.
I'm betting that underneath that anger is a huge well of pain. It needs to come out, but in a healthy way. Perhaps it might be good to talk with a counselor?
Take care,
Julie
Posts: 413 | Location: Florida | Registered: March 22, 2004
I don't honestly know how to respond to what you have said, but I am not afraid of trying. From what I have read, anger is one of the stages a person goes through during the grieving process. Most people do not respond well to someone else being angry, even though at times it is appropriate to be angry.
What I have discovered in my own experience is that no matter whether I have a right to be angry or not, most of the time it is to my advantage to simply let the anger go. usually it's not in my best interests to get upset, the emtotional energy required is just not worth it. Also, if I haven't let the anger go by sundown, literally, or within 48 hours, I may have a forgiveness issue or an unforgiveness issue I need to look at.
Having been through all that you have, be patient and compassionate with yourself. It may take some time to work through simply due to all of life's external stressors you have experienced.
Life's battles don't always go to the stronger, the smarter, the faster hand; But sooner or later the person who wins is the one who thinks "I can." Author Unknown
Posts: 2254 | Location: Wichita Falls, TX | Registered: December 28, 2002
Originally posted by Don53: I don't honestly know how to respond to what you have said, but I am not afraid of trying. From what I have read, anger is one of the stages a person goes through during the grieving process. Most people do not respond well to someone else being angry, even though at times it is appropriate to be angry.
What I have discovered in my own experience is that no matter whether I have a right to be angry or not, most of the time it is to my advantage to simply let the anger go. usually it's not in my best interests to get upset, the emtotional energy required is just not worth it. Also, if I haven't let the anger go by sundown, literally, or within 48 hours, I may have a forgiveness issue or an unforgiveness issue I need to look at.
Having been through all that you have, be patient and compassionate with yourself. It may take some time to work through simply due to all of life's external stressors you have experienced.
Good advice, Don
Posts: 2638 | Location: Oak Harbor, OH | Registered: August 11, 2001
conner, anger is an emotion just like all other emotions, and it does rear it head now and then. i understand being angry, ive been angry the last 3 months myself. I manage to hide it often but it comes out in my health when i do that. Working through what and who we are angry at, i think is a process, that takes time. At least im finding that for myself. I know who im angry at , but i cant tell this person why and how i feel, its to close to home. So, i will continue working through it with God and let him lead me where he wants me to go. Forgivness doesnt just happen, it has to come from the spirit. Love you Nelly
Personally, I kept my anger inside for many years, so when I feel it now, I really want to make surer I experience it before trying to do anything to make it go away. If I do anything to Make it go prematurely, I run the risk of turning it in towards myself the way I used to do.
There is something strengthening about being angry as long as I don't over do it. It beats blaming myself.
I'm don't know whether this resonates with your experiences but figured to mention it in case it does.
Posts: 34 | Location: New York (35 miles N of city) | Registered: October 02, 2006
ok, I have a statement and question...I just recently got so mad at my uncle, because we was arguing over food. I want to fix a package of rolls for lunch,,and he wanted to save them for his company that coming in 3 or 4 days and started making mocking me, and trying to belittle me. I got so angry, that I just went into my studio and shut the door and turned on some music, and tried to calm down, but that made me feel like I was cowering down to him...so that adds to me being angy...I was so mad and angry, that I was shaking, and that made me so mad, that I was shaking...so please let me hear your advice.....seriously....Joseph-
Posts: 48 | Location: little rock, arkansas | Registered: June 29, 2007
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