Hey folks... i've been away a while and things are going good. However, the other day i had a particularly difficult day at work and came home to an "anxious episode". I was talking to my daughter about her day and in the course of the conversation it came up that a teacher (male) gave her a peck on the cheek. Normally I don't think I would have let this bother me but given my state of mind I did. I'e met this teacher and, along with my wife, thionk he's a nice guy. He was up for teacher of the year in our district and has been teaching for 20+ years. Thinking about it now that I have calmed down I don't think I would be upset if it were a female teacher. I guess what I am looking for is opinions... Am I succumbing to societal stereotypes about male teachers? Did I overreact due to a nasty day at work? My wife has been reassuring me that she doesn't think it is anything to worry about and I am coming around but still am shaking some body symptoms. Our daughter did not feel at all uncomfortable about it and she tells us that this and any other teacher has never made her feel in any way uncomfortable. We have had many talke with her about what is and is not appropriate behavior for her and for adults so we think she has a good idea concerning that.

Sorry for rambling... any thoughts are appreciated.

Happee can I ask you what grade your daughter is in? Is she in highschool or college? I know I over react to things, but if your daughter was mine, I think I would of reacted the same as you, but we are in the same boat, so maybe I'm wrong. Good Luck in getting better, and I hope this wasn't anything, but just a peck on a cheak. Take care, Elisa

I think it's good you're trying not to overreact, but it would concern me, as well. i don't think it's appropriate. I think a teacher would want to be careful not to do anything that could look bad for them, just because they could get falsely accused. I hope your daughter will continue to be open with you if she has any concerns. Is your question about whether or not you should report it?

Happe,
I dont know how old your daughter is, but as a mom, i would of had the same probelm you had with it. If a teacher, male or female, wants to pat a kid on the back and say Good Job for something they have done thats one thing, but a kiss on the cheek is quite another. It was inappropriate for that teacher to do that. Im sure your daughter probably likes this teacher, but anytime somtehing like this happens, as parents we have to be very aware and cautious. Im glad your daughter told yu, but i would make it clear to her, if it happens again, yu will go and have a talk with this teacher. This is just my opinion and i dont want you getting angry or anxious all over again, but there is a line a teacher shouldnt cross in my opinion. Thanks, Nelly

Thank you all for your replies.

My daughter is in 3rd grade and this took place out in the open in front of other kids. My problem was with the appropriateness of it all. My gut instinct was that it wasn't but by the same token my daughter is a sweet affecionate young girl who runs up and hugs all her teachers. I also have to realize that at age 8 the story I am told may not be exactly how things happened.

The decision I have made is to see if it happens again and the details of it all if it does. I will then go to speak with the teacher and let him know that we are trying to teach our daughter boundaries and that kissing is fine for grandma but not people outside the family in most circumstances. I honestly believe there was nothing malicious about it now that I have had time to reflect but I also believe that it is not something I feel entirely comfortable with. If I am still feeling uncomfortable in a couple days I will just go in and tak to the teacher before she has class with him again.