Ok. I am only 3 days away from my surgery and I cannot believe what I am allowing myself to go through with the anticipatory anxiety and "what-if" thinking. I have done well for a long time and then some big unknown pops up and Bam! I am scared. I have had the hardest time not writing "just in case" letters to my family and planning for their future without me...it is so dumb, I just hate how scared I am of the meds and anesthesia...I am 31 and I think I am healthy, but you always think about the chest pains you have that are probably pulled muscles, and what if it is actually your heart and the anesthesia brings it out....you know all of those dumb thoughts. Then I have told the Dr. that I do not want a bunch of meds before I wake up, which I am supposed to discuss with the anesthesioligist, but now my mom says if I don't let them give me whatever they need to I will be sorry......UUGGHHHH!!!!

Just Venting,
Chrystal

What kind of surgery?

Left tube and ovary removal and a cyst that they need to test....also an ablasion....

HI there I am so happy that you are willing to do this think of it this way ,.
if I get this checked then I will know if im fine or not no one needs the worry expecially on top of anxiety about heath issues I know I have health issues myself and have been threw some operations also and had that what if thinking its horrible but whenits all said and done I find out what I need to know and thats the best feeling in the world.
then I can actually stop worring about it .. I understand the fear everyone has that b4 going threw sergerys ask anyone who has been threw one .. by the way ask the anesthesioligist to give you something to relax b4 having it done .I know you dont want all the meds but Girl it helps SO MUCH . you will be thankfull you took the meds ,, and I am sure you will do just fine in surgery . and you have no worries after its all done with you wount remember a thing it will seem to u like you was only asleep for like a minute and its the best sleep anyone has ever had . I had fears of the anastesia but I never felt so refreshed I felt like I slep a hole year and it was the best reat I had ,.
my prayers will be with you and make sure when you get home and ajusted you update us and let us know how you are doing .
take care and you WILL BE FINE ...

New Day....just keep using your skills that you learned through the program. They will take you there and through the panic and surgery. Keep telling yourself the truth and don't let the fear overcome you. I went to the dentist the other day and though that is not surgery I had some pretty scary thoughts and events happen while there. I just held on for dear life to my skills and the things I've learned through this program. I paid very close attention to what I was telling myself and I encouraged myself with the fact that this guy has been a dentist for 18 years and if anything (if thinking) came up he would know how to handle it. You need the surgery. Remember that it is necessary and you have everything you need to get yourself through it. Be sure that you are combating those 'what if' statements in your head with positive truths. Your doctor found the problem for you, he can fix it for you. Build up your strength in your mind these next two days and keep yourself strong! Fight to win! Even when you're afraid you can keep yourself calm. The goal is to walk through, not avoid. You can do it afraid.
I am praying for you and looking forward to hearing from you when you're done!

Thank you guys so much!!! I am so full of fear, I know people do this everyday it is just different when it is you...I will let you guys know as soon as I know!!!

Chrystal