for everything! Could you? This is what I am facing myself. Pretty scary. I always thought I'd have someone to take care of me.

Thru this program and even therapy the answer is that I am responsible for everything I think, say and do! For me it was so much easier when my husband was well and we were a team. Not the case anymore. Due to his health I have had to take charge! I just feel like I have one more child to take care of, only this time I am a single parent.

Anyone else pretty much on their own?

Like to hear from you!
rhythm

Hi rhythm,
I'am not on my own but I have been married for 22 years and have two great kids, and I have been a stay at home mom for 14 years. My husband has always been a healthy man, he is only 41 (I'am 39) but recently he has been having this overwhelming fatigue, he has been to a couple of docs and they can't find anything wrong but it has made me think about my life and what it would be like without him in it.
A couple of weeks ago I thought he had cancer because of the symptoms that he has had, I freaked, I spent days crying because I was so afraid that I was going to lose him. I would really miss him since he is my best friend but I would also be on my own caring for two kids with no career to fall back on. I'am also a recovering agoraphobic and even though I can go to a few places, I'am afraid of doing a whole lot and I just saw my life being taken away! Losing my kids because I couldn't work, losing my home because I couldn't pay.....needless to say I'am working very hard to reclaim my independance so that I won't have all of the bad things happen if something should happen to him. I tell myself everyday that there was a time in my life that I could do anything I wanted without thinking about it, and I know that I will get to that point again, it is just going to take time and effort.
I think people who have to take care of everything in their lives are very strong people, mabe they don't know it but they are. It must be hard for you to be in the very situation that I fear the most. I hope things get easier for you in the future.
I don't know if this helps you but I appreciated your post.
Take care,
Jodi

Dear Jodi,

Yes! Your reply has helped alot!!! Thank you! You and I have some similarities. We have 2 sons that are on their own now and have been married 24 yrs. (I'm 45 and my husband is 47)

Seems to me that alot of women do think about what it would be like if something happened to their husband. Not just us that have this disorder. I admire you trying to get your independence back. It sounds like you will. I have been pretty independent as my husbands condition has been going on for 14 yrs. He actually was Mr.Mom while I worked so the boys never had anyone else care for them. Over the past 2 yrs he's gotten worse and we are in the midst of some major life changes. In a way I feel like I have to make the decisions for myself as he can not take care of himself. It's complicated. I just have to trust that it will all work out.

I hope you husbands condition isn't anything serious.

God bless,
rhythm