I'm actually at lesson 12, but I thought what I have to say is more relevant to this topic...assertive behavior. I moved to the states a year ago to study...by myself. I left friends and family behind to to create my own life here, and so far I'm really doing well. I love my new friends and I feel that I have reached out for new people, inspite of my "shyness".
However, I'm now getting visit from my home country and it is one of my best friends. Of course I'm happy because she is coming, but there are also other feelings that I feel a little bit ashamed of. She is really awesome, and she has always been supportive to me, and I really love her as a friend. However, she is the outgoing type and she makes friends easier than anyone I know, and she talks 90% of the time we talk,...this is the way it always been. It is hard to get her to listen and when I try she acts as if what I'm saying is not really important. I feel that I have anger hidden underneath towards her behavior or (my behavior), which I really don't like. I can get really cranky and moody when she starts. I feel like a ten year old sometimes because of these feelings. I'm almost afraid that she is gonna take my new friends away from me....steeling the show. I know that this is totally my own thoughts about it, and I know that she would never do something like this on purpose. However, I feel that I have come a long way with my assertive behavior when it comes to other people but with her I still have to work on it. I'm almost anxious to show her my "new" me but at the same time I'm afraid that I'm gonna get back to old patterns ones she is here. I don't know why I feel such resistance, I thought I was ok. Without getting angry I wanna be able to tell her that I want her to listen to me for ones. But I also wanna be able to relax and don't feel that she is gonna take something away from me, whether it is friends, my "new" me or what it is. I realize that I have to change my thinking in order to get through this in a positive way, but I really need some help with it. I wanna get through this wall being assertive and let go of my frustration and anger.

Are you jealouse of her? Or are you angry at yourself for not being assertive enough? Maybe talking to her would help she may not even know she's doing it on purpose. sort of a subconscious thing. My suggestion is talk to her about how you feel she is treating you. I know because I had to the same thing I talked to them about how I felt or I started getting assertive they didnt want be friends no more there was no official word on terminating it we just stopped hanging out together. we still say hi to each other when we cross paths we just dont associate. Some of them were my friends for 20 years. It's a just a part of moving on. There's whole world out there, plenty of people to make friends with. Those people just liked me cause I didnt stir the water.