Hi all!
SO right now has been a tough time in my life.
My grandfather is in the hosital up in northern michigan and is having open heart surgery on Monday morning.
He is a very strong man, still has a great sometimes dirty, sense of humor =). Gotta love him for it!
To make a long story short.... His health has become very limited in the last few years. He has been diagnosed with Congestive Heart Failure, diabetes, only has one kidney, had some fluid on his lungs and now this. Oh and they also just ofund out he has sleep apnea.
Poor guy, but it is what it is and we are supporting him through it.
Well for those that haven't ever read my discussions before, One of my biggest symptoms are Obsessive Scary thoughts (hurting others, myslef) etc. etc.
I have been dealing with all of these on my own and it has been extremely hard but I think I'm getting it. I am diffusing them SO much adn all of this seems to be a big test too.
But I keep telling myself that no matter what happens with my grandpa, I can handle it..
We as a family will ahndle whatever it is we need to do for him.
So..
He doesn't want my sister or I to come up there for his surgery because he doesn't want us to see him after since he will be in the ICU and hooked up to all sorts of things.
I was hurt at first but after thinking about it I do understand where he is coming from.
Last night I talked with him and he was basically telling me he wasn't going to make it thorugh the surgery. It was awful to hear him cry, sob and feel helpless. I didn't really know what to do. I kept him positive by telling him how is going to see me get my degree and my neice grow up and he will get through all this.
So today my sister calls me and tells me she is insisting on going up there this weekend. I feel that we shouldn;t be making waves and making him feel excited or anxious before a heart surgery. I spoke with him, my grandmother and even asked the nurse if they thought he should really take it easy and they all agreed that that was the right decision.
So I then called and spoke with my sister and told her about all this. Well she is basically already thinking the possible worst case scenario.
I told her exactly what it was that I thought and I really don't think this is the best thing for us to do while he is preparing for this heart surgery. Now being assetive to my sister is like yelling at the pope!
She didn't like at all what I was saying and she even made a rude comment!
my boyfriend and I are hosting a euchre tournament tomorrow night and mind you if my grandfather said that he wanted me to BE THERE i WOULD in a heart beat!
Well after all this was said she said.... "well now you don't have to miss your euchre tournament?"
I couldn't believe it!
I simply told her " If you want to be immature about this then go ahead but I'm not choosing to be that way" and I simply hung up the phone!
I can't believe it!
I feel good about that!
yeah me!
Please say a prayer for my grandfather aswell!!!