It seems like every time I meet someone[of the opposite sex]and start to get interested,I find something wrong with them, something that I just know would bother me. Yet I know that no one is perfect,including me.I have very high expectations, but shouldn't I ??? I do not want to end up with the 'wrong guy' Any imput ?

Hi Becbeliever!
I just want to offer support. I have lived for many years with extremely high expectations in a partner. What I have recently realized is that no one is perfect and even the men I have loved in my life had their flaws, they were just flaws I was willing to accept. I think it's important to keep the expectations reasonably above average so that you don't settle for the "wrong guy", but also to remember that there are "right guys" who are not perfect. This is a tricky issue because perfectionism is something that cannot be attained by nature. So, I wonder for myself sometimes who I think is perfect.....I can't come up with anyone every time I ask that. So, I say look for less than perfect but well above what you consider ordinary. Somewhere in there, you may find the balance and the "right guy." I'm with you on this one.....it's a struggle but one worth pushing through.....

I SORT of have the opposite problem. I am afraid to approach anyone, or I leave the seen when a guy shows interest in me.
I feel that if people find out about anxiety and depression problems, that they won't like me anymore.
I am goin to be 21 in June, and i have never had a boyfriend.

Tahirra,
That is SO not true. People will like you MORE when you're REAL with them. Trust me, I have LOTS of friends, and they ALL know about the condition I've had and have stuck by me all along!I realize that a BOYFRIEND is a little more personal, but it really is basically the same concept. At first I was really embarrassed about what I was going through and all, the panic attacks, etc.. I didn't want anyone to know [not even my siblings]It was on a NEED TO KNOW basis.Eventually EVERYONE found out. But I soon discovered that NO ONE changed towards me. And they were all surprisingly supportive.Being real with the people in my life brought me freedom.I also believe it brought THEM freedom as well.I've been complimented about my 'transparency.'People actually LIKE that! Well,hope that helps.

to bcbeliever,
What is perfection anyway. In my business I meet alot of couples. ( I am a makeup artist and I have a lot of bridal clients) Ok, so I see the couple at a moment of bliss, but bliss comes from within. Do you remember the group in tape 2 with the guy who's panic began because he wasn't sure about school, his girlfriend, etc. Well anyway, the journey of self discovery is traveled best by taking a chance or 2. Perfect how? How they look?, How they dress, eat, dance, tell a joke? What are you looking for in a partner? Are you looking for them to complete the other half of you. If you are, it doesn't work that way. I think that just simply sitting down with your journal and writing things that you value in a partner would be a good start. If you meet someone that sparks your interest, go for it and float with some of your feelings, they may be something you can push through. It is scary out there. I know, I remember. There is someone for everyone out there, I do believe, even if that someone is just yourself. I wish you the best, Linda

i think the saying goes: better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all.

some day you'll have to get those feet wet and see where it goes.