I'm on week 3 of the tapes. A couple of weeks ago I was just about to return the program when I had a bad night's sleep. I was up from midnight until about 4 a.m. with those anxious feelings and racing thoughts. A day or two later I realized that I hadn't had those feelings and a bad night like that for approximately a month, the same time frame I had the program. It made me realize that the program DOES work so I decided to keep it.
My problem is that since that night, I've gone back to several bad nights this past week. I don't know what is bringing it on strong again, unless it's just the increased anxiety after starting the program that is mentioned on the tapes. I know exactly what it is that is bothering me, finances.
This leads to another issue for me, getting a job, which my husband doesn't want me to do. He wants me home with the kids. Here I go, blaming someone else but I'll say it anyway, I feel helpless and 'fathered' by him. I am his 'victim' of control. He has a way of making life very hard and uncomfortable when I don't do things his way.
Some would say to leave him, but I really want to make things work, partially because I am scared to be alone (single), partially because of our kids and partially because of my upbringing. One major reason I purchased the program was the promise of self-esteem and assertiveness training. I believe it may either make me strong enough to say what I feel WHEN I feel it to make our lives together what it should be, but I keep in mind that it may just give me the confidence to pick myself up and leave.
I'm just worried, scared and confused. Any thoughts on these issues of increased mid-night anxiety and/or of becoming a stronger person for my marriage? You can e-mail me at Dianeieb@msn.com

Hello,

your self-esteem and assertiveness will definitely improve with the program, be sure of that! As for you relationship probems and all the other stuff, it is really hard to give any advice, you know we all face difficult situations in our life, in fact this is life, it�s about making choices and decisions and then live with it in peace. You CHOOSE what�s best for you in life. I always used to think, when my anxiety is gone i will do this and that, but that is running away from it all, life is here and now and wainting for us to step into it.

After all we only have one life to live and it is very precious.

Wish you all the best,

Marco

Thanks for your words of encouragement Marco. Keep them coming.