Obviously I am a new member to the AA&D program. I am in therapy currently and considering consulting my Dr. about medication for anxiety and depression but I am afraid of the weight gain and possible lethargy that could go along with that. Any advice? I have one other question (for the moment) and that is how much should you let your family know about your condition. Really nobody has any idea about how serious this condition is for me. I just started a new therapist and he doesn't even know (he hasn't asked). I am just curious because I started to tell my husband some of my symptoms and he looks at me funny and acts as if he doesn't want me to go into it any further. I protray a normal person aside from the fact that I have no extra activities outside of work and I have an extremly short fuse with my husband. Please give me some insight. Any advice is greatly appreciated. Thanks.

Hi flutterby! Glad to have you on the bulletin board. Your question about your family reminded me of how I told my family that I had just been diagnosed with Panic Disorder. I had been suffering from daily panic attacks for 10 years and had not told a soul. I was the "perfect child" of the family and didn't think I could let anyone know that I wasn't "perfect." I finally decided that I didn't have anything to lose and a lot to gain from telling them that I was in pain. I had a truly wonderful response from my family and I consider myself fortunate to have great parents and a wonderful sister. My mother reminded me of the people in my family that suffered from similar problems and didn't find it surprising that I might be prone to an anxiety disorder. Her only shock was that I had suffered for so long and no one knew anything about it!!!!

I know that I have read other posts on this bulletin board of people who haven't received the type of response from family members that I did. Its a hard decision to make but I felt that my road to recovery started with acknowledging the problem and learning that I did not have to be ashamed. I continued to make my anxiety worse by hiding it so, for me, I had to embrace it which meant letting other people know that it was something that I had to deal with. My self-esteem had been shattered by the anxiety disorder and letting others close to me know about my struggle helped me to reclaim a part of me that I felt I had lost.

Good luck with your decision -- it can be a tough one. I just wanted to let you know that there can be some real positives that come from telling others about your condition. I am still on the road to recovery and I have less and less difficulty sharing information about my condition with others. And its amazing how many people understand and can relate to what we go through.

I guess part of the problem is that none of the therapists that I have seen have taken me seriously. I have not ever been diagnosed with anything. The last therapist was even hesitant on saying mild depression to me. I feel like everyone thinks that this is a big joke. This program and website are the only reason that I believe that I am not going insane. There is way too much here that I relate to in a very real way. I just don't know if it would be any benenfit to me at all to tell anyone in my family or church or work as I do not want to have deal with convincing anyone. I know that it is real, I am the one who has to make it change, I am the one who has to live with it. I will give you an example of how people do not take my feelings seriously. I called my mother in the height of a panic/rage episode and she was totally unsupportive. She actually made that night worse for me. I just don't know if telling anyone would benefit me at all. I am even scared to go to my Dr. to see about meds because I have nothing to back myself up that this is real. I feel like I am crazy to even think that I have anxiety and depression. Guess I am not starting this day off very good with all of this negativity. I kind of got on a roll here. In any case thanks for the words of encouragement.
~Flutterby

Sorry to hear that you have been having such difficulty and obviously are feeling troubled and alone. Have you purchased the Attacking Anxiety and Depression tape series or read Lucinda Bassett's book From Panic to Power? If not, maybe that is something you might want to consider. I think that many of us who are recovering from anxiety and depression have felt very alone and as if no one understood what we were going through. How could they -- they didn't experience things they way we did. I tried my best to explain things to people but what I was saying really didn't register with them. They didn't experience the detached feelings, terrible fear, the racing heartbeat, etc. that went along with a panic attack that seemed to have no cause.

Rest assured that there are many people who post here on a regular basis who can relate to the way you feel. Hang in there. If you haven't read From Panic to Power, I would suggest that you get it and read it. If nothing else, it will help you to understand some of the things you might be going through and will help you to understand how you can overcome the anxiety and depression.

Thanks for the support. I have not had the chance to go find any of Lucinda's books. I did order the tapes for AA&D though. I started the program on Monday. I just need some support from somewhere as this is a scary process of change. I have made a lot of changes already in regards to my responses to anger but those changes are more external. Like for example I make a conscious effort to not be sarcastic...but that does not change what I feel inside. I have gone through my entire life being a survivor...standing alone. I have been thinking alot lately about the fact that I say I want to be comforted but I do not allow that to happen. I push it away every time that it is offered. I just don't know on this one if I should try to tell people or not...that in itself is a huge struggle for me. Like I said before I do not want to have to convince anyone and I guess maybe I don't want extra attention. I don't want people to ask me how it is going. I will talk about things when I choose to. Maybe it is just another control issue....I just don't know. Thanks for your help though. It is nice to have suggestions and in a huge way your response feels like support to me. Thanks