Upon completing the program, I received a letter today from Carolyn at MWC. She asked if I'd be willing to be quoted in her online newsletter or the Less Stress Press. This made me sit down and write out my story. I thought I'd share it here. I'll understand if you don't read it all. It's kinda long.

Midwest Center:

I recently completed the program and wanted to share my story. I am a middle school teacher who has had anxiety all of my life. I started having panic attacks when I moved out on my own. I have five siblings, so living alone was a major culture shock!

I had my first panic attack when I was 27. Of course, I didn�t realize it was a panic attack until much later. On this night, I woke up scared to death. It was just an overwhelming wave of fear. I started to get dressed, knowing I was going to have to call someone to take me to the hospital. I remember pacing the floor, telling myself to relax. I finally did.

I began to worry about having a panic attack in front of my students. (Which I did, several times. Of course, they didn�t know it.) Naturally, all of this worrying led to more anxiety. When I started having trouble sleeping, I went to my doctor who wanted to prescribe an antidepressant. I took one and decided not to take anymore. It made my anxiety worse! Time went on, and I handled the anxiety the best way I knew how. On one sleepless night, I saw your infomercial. I ordered it, but sent it back before the 30-day guarantee was up. My anxiety had gotten a little better, and I was so afraid of paying $400 and it not working.

During the next couple of years, I planned a wedding, got married, and made plans to build a house. No anxiety there! Once the house was built, it seemed everything should be perfect in my little world. And that�s when the panic attacks came back. Looking back now, I think it was because I had nothing to worry about, nothing to focus on. The wedding was over, and the house was built. So I concentrated on me and drove myself into a panic. It was a day in January 2004, when I couldn�t walk into Wal-Mart because I was scared to death of having a panic attack, that I decided to order the program again, and keep it.

It�s now July 2004. I can�t tell you the last time I had a panic attack. I can�t say I don�t have anxiety anymore. I�m not sure I will ever be able to say that. I also can�t say that anxiety doesn�t scare me. I think that will come with time. But I can say that I�m not as afraid of anxiety as I was before. I know that if I go shopping or go to work, and I feel anxious, I can handle it. And if I do have a panic attack, I know it�ll be over in a few minutes and I can go on with my day. I didn�t know that before. My biggest fear was having the panic attack to end all panic attacks. I now know that those don�t exist.

I use, and will continue to use, the relaxation tape at least once a day. I walk two miles a day and watch what I eat. As much as I hate to walk, I have seen that my anxiety and depression are lessened when I exercise. I haven�t completely cut out caffeine, but I�ve learned that more than one cup of caffeine a day really raises my anxiety level.

The program really has improved my life. I have a wonderful husband, who even though he doesn�t completely understand what I�m going through, is always willing to listen and encouraged me throughout the program. Speaking of support, the chat room at Stresscenter.com has been a blessing to me. I�ve met wonderful people there who have lived what I�ve lived. It�s so nice to connect to people who get IT! I guess I�m lucky in the fact that I only suffered with panic attacks for a few years before I found the program. It amazes me when I hear people who have suffered for ten, twenty, or thirty years. I�m truly blessed.

Thank you

Annie, congratulations on overcoming your fear. It is a hard thing to do. The program does work wonders but, I want to give you the credit for your hard work and dedication to your recovery. I went through the program once and now again with a coach. I currently am in week ten. I feel better but I am afraid to face my fears(because I fear the feelings) and I know that is holding me back from my own recovery. I have suffered over ten years with anxiety and panic attacks. I just hope one of these days I'll build up my self confidence just as you have.
GOOD FOR YOU ANNIE!!

Thanks. Although I am confident, I can't say I'm not afraid of anxiety. I hope that'll come with time.

Good luck on your journey!
Annie

Hi Ane,
Your post is wonderful. I'd love to get the results you got. I am on my way ( week 6).This is the first time to use the chat room, and I am happy that I discovered your post. I am a high school teacher ( my 3rd year) and I had my first anxiety attack at the beginning of the school year( last year).I have had anxiety and panicky feelings almost on a daily basis, to the point that I drove only to school and back. I avoided to go alone anywhere because I was afraid I would faint.I am learning new skills, but I still struggle. I have days when I am very tired and I feel like it is a struggle to do whatever I have to do. One thing that is really weird is that on these days I feel weak ( like I have rubbery legs) without being actually anxious.I hope and pray to God that I will be able to learn and apply all the copping skills. I hope for the good. Have you ever been nervous when just before the school started?
cristina

Annie,
Thank you so much for sharing. Your experiences almost mirror mine. I am a teacher as well and the fear of having panic attacks in front of my students was a constant pressure. Of course your right, they did not know.

Congrats..on your journey. Your story is inspiring as well. I have went through the program and I feel so much better.

Thanks for sharing.

Heatherlee