Today is my first day back at work in almost a week because I have not been sleeping. My OCD fear is that I will hurt myself. My sister's attempt at this is what started this all. Anyway, I am not sleeping well and last week I got so depressed that I felt like I was fed up and hopeless. In my mind it even further solidified my OCD fear because of that feeling of hopelessness which in turn caused more anxiety. Then I realised today that I was feeling depressed because I was so anxious. If I stop the anxiety it will help stop the depression too. I was very anxious this morning at work today, OCD thoughts running rampant, and I stopped and said to myself, I don't have to be scared anymore, it is not me, it is my anxiety disorder. I have felt calm and in control since. It is my mantra today. It is a feeling like finding out you don't have cancer. Just an immense sense of relief! I want to hold on to this realization forever and not forget. That is part of the reason why I am typing this so I can come back and look if I need to.

Man, it's so true, isn't it??
Stop the anxiety, stop the depression. I just wish it wasn't so damn hard some days.
I've been on the program for 2 weeks now and definitely have 2 good days followed by a day of old bad habits and thinking. BUT, I can at least say that I've HAD the GOOD days. I couldn't say that for months before and I definitely feel like I'm makin progress.
Thanks for your post Em.
You're sooo right and I hope you are still doing well with your mantra.

Thank you!