Hello Everyone
I think I just need to get alot of stuff of my chest. This has been an eventful past couple of months. I have held in alot of emotions.
First lets start with my miscarriage. It happened and I realize and know that it is an act of nature. I have no problem with that. But what scares me is getting pregnant again and having another one. The doctors tell me that it probably wont but it is back there in my brain nagging at me. I have listened to the tapes wrote it down but it just wont go away and it is driving me nuts!!!! Plus all the people in my small town have a hard time talking to me and I think they are afraid of hurting my feelings. Well that wont happen it was an act of nature there was nothing anyone or anything could do to stop it, I wish people would realize this.

Second, I am a Medical Responder on our local fire department and we got called to an accident were a young man fell and hit his head. Well we responded and found the kid not breathing and with no pulse. We brought him back to life which is wonderful. But while all this was happening I felt like I had a million people standing there telling me what to do. It really made me feel like I looked like an idiot and didnt know what I was doing and it probably looked that way to. Anyways to make a long story short the kid lived and we never received one thank you and now I have a fear of dying or having a heart attack and no being able to help. I know that I am not going to have a heart attack it just is nagging me that I could have done more for the kid.

Last but not least I am feeling like I am losing my mind. But I look at it like this. I am not losing it but just gaining it back from when I had my bad anxiety two Years ago.
Now where did this idea come from I will never know.I probably just am not looking hard enough at this one to figure out the cause but I dont want to waste anymore time looking for it.

Anyone with any suggestions,comments or concerns let me know

Take Care
Albertagirl

Hi Albertagirl,

I can relate to your symptoms. They seem like they are all around worrying about something bad happening to you. Classic anxiety. I used to be so worried that I was losing my mind. That was many years ago, and I'm still real sane. I also had almost every physical and mental hypochondria fear you could imagine (and we are creative people). Don't worry, it's not insanity, it's anxiety, really! I am in my late 40's and spent way too much time worrying about this stuff. I wish I could get back every minute that I've spent in worry, anxiety or fear. We can only go forward. Our bodies are incredible and usually very healthy. I'll make you a deal, you don't worry about being physically or mentally ill, and I'll do the same. Do this for a day, and then for a week. See how much more enjoyable your life is. If you don't like it, you can go back to worrying. One more thing, just think of how much more creativity and energy you'll have to make good decisions in your life without the dark cloud of anxiety hanging over your life.

Don't worry,

Alexi

quote:

Originally posted by albertagirl:
Hello Everyone
I think I just need to get alot of stuff of my chest. This has been an eventful past couple of months. I have held in alot of emotions.
First lets start with my miscarriage. It happened and I realize and know that it is an act of nature. I have no problem with that. But what scares me is getting pregnant again and having another one. The doctors tell me that it probably wont but it is back there in my brain nagging at me. I have listened to the tapes wrote it down but it just wont go away and it is driving me nuts!!!! Plus all the people in my small town have a hard time talking to me and I think they are afraid of hurting my feelings. Well that wont happen it was an act of nature there was nothing anyone or anything could do to stop it, I wish people would realize this.

Second, I am a Medical Responder on our local fire department and we got called to an accident were a young man fell and hit his head. Well we responded and found the kid not breathing and with no pulse. We brought him back to life which is wonderful. But while all this was happening I felt like I had a million people standing there telling me what to do. It really made me feel like I looked like an idiot and didnt know what I was doing and it probably looked that way to. Anyways to make a long story short the kid lived and we never received one thank you and now I have a fear of dying or having a heart attack and no being able to help. I know that I am not going to have a heart attack it just is nagging me that I could have done more for the kid.

Last but not least I am feeling like I am losing my mind. But I look at it like this. I am not losing it but just gaining it back from when I had my bad anxiety two Years ago.
Now where did this idea come from I will never know.I probably just am not looking hard enough at this one to figure out the cause but I dont want to waste anymore time looking for it.

Anyone with any suggestions,comments or concerns let me know

Take Care
Albertagirl

Sounds like a deal to me Alexi. No more worries for a day then a week and then finally a month and so on. Take care your advice has helped me. Much appreciated.

Albertagirl

quote:

Originally posted by amolden:
Hi Albertagirl,

I can relate to your symptoms. They seem like they are all around worrying about something bad happening to you. Classic anxiety. I used to be so worried that I was losing my mind. That was many years ago, and I'm still real sane. I also had almost every physical and mental hypochondria fear you could imagine (and we are creative people). Don't worry, it's not insanity, it's anxiety, really! I am in my late 40's and spent way too much time worrying about this stuff. I wish I could get back every minute that I've spent in worry, anxiety or fear. We can only go forward. Our bodies are incredible and usually very healthy. I'll make you a deal, you don't worry about being physically or mentally ill, and I'll do the same. Do this for a day, and then for a week. See how much more enjoyable your life is. If you don't like it, you can go back to worrying. One more thing, just think of how much more creativity and energy you'll have to make good decisions in your life without the dark cloud of anxiety hanging over your life.

Don't worry,

Alexi

Hi,
I am sorry to hear about your miscarriage. You had a loss and you need to allow yourself time to grieve that loss. How are you doing with the grief?

You must be a very caring person to take up rescue work. Wow, what a job. I can only imagine the work involved in that. If you are expecting a thank you at all then your expectations are probably too high. Most people are so consumed with what is going on that they don't even think about that. But know that when they think back on that night that they are thankful you were there to help. I've been there. I know. I remember those people who were there. I may not have said thank you but I am forever thankful in my heart to those people who gave of themselves. You are like one of those people.

Please don't be worried about what you look like out there. You are putting too much pressure on yourself to perform. All you have to do is focus on the job at hand and put others out of your mind. Remind yourself that you know your job and it doesn't matter what others think as long as you did all you could. You also need to tell yourself that you did a good job instead of thinking how you could have done more. You are not a miracle maker. You did as much as you could and thats that. Be proud of yourself.

I would suggest doing this program. I know you are going to come accross people who think they are having a heart attack and they are actually having a panic attack. Think how much more helpful you are going to be to those who have no other help. For those who don't know how anxiety is affecting their lives. This program is really helpful.

Anxiety will make you feel like you are losing your mind. Its all anxiety, but the program will help you change those thoughts and attitudes.

Let us know how you are doing, Reena

Alberta
A miscarriage is a stress on a body, emotionally, physically, socially, psychologically, hormonally. Do not discount the fact that your body is saying "whoa! have enough to process for now!" Even though it is an act of nature, it is still a painful process. I know. I've had three miscarriages.
Stress has got your attention. The thoughts, the body symptoms, the disappointment. It's a frustrating business. So have a cry and take a break. But when you feel rested, you may get some answers and some motivation to work at this condition yet once again. Keep in touch...
Tammy

Albertagirl,

My heart goes out to you. Along with all of the other wonderful replies here, I hope you take the time to treat yourself like you would your best friend. Lots of compassion, love and patience.

Take extra care,
*Diane*