I am taking this new theory to heart as of late. I know that I create my own situations, and need to be more focused on taking on each problem at a time. But there are days like today, where lack of work, lack of patcience for myself and others begins to grate on me. I feel the pressure building and really need someone to talk to.
I am having issues with my husband's lack of responsibility. He is a procrastinator. He is an avoider. Sometimes I think he lives in his own little world. We have no car, no money and are barely getting by paying bills at the last minute. I am a dog groomer and for three solid weeks have only worked one or two days. This is all adding up in my mind and as much as I am trying to be greatfull and focus, his deppression is getting worse, he will not start this program or even exercise with me. We are growing apart and it hurts me so much. He has let things snowball out of control with the bills, even with me trying to encorage him on how to handle his past missteps. I feel like I am about to go through another bout of depression. I am fighting it. I keep hoping that some miricle will hapen for us. I keep praying that our chipping away will pay off. The bills and frozen bank accounts, studunt loans, insurance companies not paying for surguries they are supposed to cover, kids needing braces, garnished checks and the sinking feeling at the pit of my stomache, will all be resolved eventually. How am I to handle all of this when he won't take real responsibility for his actions? He justs beats himself up but won't really do anything about it. He is a very sweet and sensitive man, he tries very hard to make everyone else happy all of the time he barely does anything for himself but play video games, he is so depressed. I don't know what to do, I love him so much and really want to help him and myself. ~Boy that felt good to vent! If youv'e been here and lived throughit please write back. Brightest Blessings~ Keerea

Thanks for your response! I needed to hear exactly that! how long have you been with the program and how has it changed you?
I was venting and here a couple hours later I do have a completely different perspective. Boy I sound like a whiner and i have so tried not to be today was my first time on here thank you for caring! ~ keerea

Don't give up, there is hope! I don't have the time right now to post much, but I will later today or tomorrow. Grateful has some very good points. Don't try to control what you can't, namely your husbands behavior. Encourage, try to influence, yes, but don't try to control or make him do anything. All you can control is you. I realize you are in very stressful circumstances. Just keep trucking and do what you can. Stay in the present and not in the future. Don't borrow trouble by "what if" thinking. Our emotional stability is not dependent upon our circumstances. That's right, I meant what I said. We have control over ourselves even in the toughest of circumstances. We can choose how to respond. It is not the events themselves which make us anxious and depressed, but our perception of them, how we percieve them. We can choose how we perceive them. It is hard, but it is possible to remain calm in the midst of adversity. And that calm can give us the strength and hope to get through it. Got to go. You can be the best influence on your husband by working the program and him seeing you change and seeing the strength from you in this circumstance. Believe in yourself and never stop believing. No matter what comes, hell or high water, we can make it through.

I have figured out an immediate income business for myself. I am willing to share my knowledge as long as you use it strictly for yourself meaning you don't try and sell the ideas to anyone else and try and make it into a franchise type business. If interested email me and give me an email address or something so I can give you the info. If anyone else is interested, I can give you the same info if you promise to use it only for yourself and will not show anyone else the secrets that I have discovered.

keerea,

In a newsletter from the MWC about a year ago, there was a book they were selling that caught my eye. It's "You Can Be Happy: No Matter What". The description of it goes like this: "Most believe that our happiness depends on outside circumstances, solving our problems, improving our relationships, or achieving success. Dr. Carlson (author) clearly shows that happiness has nothing to do with forces beyond our control. Recommended with lesson 3 adn 10." Just wanted to let you know about it. Sounds like it might be something you might be interested in. Take care.

Hi There,
Just knowing someone cares is so nice, thank you for your kind words. You are both right that I should just focus on myself, learn and grow through the discomfort.
Thank you, Keerea