Hello Again to everyone

Well I will just get to the point. I am an Emergency Medical Responder on a Volunteer Fire Department. There was an incident during a hockey game were our Fire Chief decided to transport the patient to the hospital without an ambulance, which by law is a big no no. Well I decided that before our little department got sued for liabilty I would take it to the board and town council. We didnt get sued but I wanted everyone to be aware of the possibility and that we shouldnt be doing this. Well holy doodle did it ever escalate into a big fight in town. My neighbor and best friends are now mad at me. Not anymore but they were. The fire chief quit. And now I feel like it is my fault for telling them the laws and have beat myself up so bad that I have panic attacks again. I know it isnt my fault he quit but it is hard not to feel a little responsible. We live in a town where women should be seen and not heard. I call it the Old boys Club. I feel I should have kept my mouth shut but I am not covered by good samaritans act because I have this certificate and they dont realize I can get in big trouble for their actions.

I talked to our Ambulance Director and he said that what they did was bad and you can get a liability suit. Then he tells our Mayor that what they did was the right thing to do. This man I think is just stirring the pot. I would like to confront him but what would be the point. He tells everyone else he never spook to us or he doesnt want to get involved. What he has done now is given the go ahead for the guys on our fire department the ok to transport. He is an Idoit!!! There are other words I would like to use but I cant.
I would like to quit the department but everyone in the community calls to tell me how much I have already helped them and would really appreciate it if I stayed on. I am in turmoil right now and the stress has now turned into anxiety I havent had in over a Year now. I feel disappointed that I let it get this far.

But I really need to let it drop but my mind wont let it. Help please. Right now I dont know who is telling the truth, even myself and who isnt.

Take Care

Albertagirl

Albertagirl,

Wow!!!! From what you have said, it sounds like you did the right thing. I don't know any of the laws regarding this situation but the person that usually sticks their neck out, gets most of the crap. People get afraid when someone rocks the boat and questions authority. I wouldn't beat yourself up over this. Instead, pat yourself on the back for standing up for what you know is true. That's assertive behaviour!!

Silvana

I say, let it go. You did what you thought was the absolute best thing to do at that time. You did not intend for anyone to get fired or lose their tempers. Stop second guessing yourself. Instead of shying away from what you did, stand tall in your convictions. Be proud of your strength.

Having 500 panic attacks will not change the situation. Don't feel you must defend yourself to anyone and if a friend or anyone else brings it up...say you are through discussing it...case closed.

You don't have to punish yourself. You are a consciencious and caring person. No matter how far you have let this go and no mater how anxious you have become due to this situation...you have the power to stop it right here. Tell yourself, "I have suffered enough, I did nothing wrong and I am proud of my actions. Anything tht has happened as a result was unintended and out of my control." (just me again stress "OUT OF MY CONTROL!!") lol

You can get past this and you are keeping it alive more than you know. You can overcome this...start being kind to yourself once again. You can do it!!

Hi Albertagirl! I don't know if I can add anything to what MaggieMay and Silvana have offered. You did the right thing. You don't have to beat yourself up over it. I went through EMT training several years ago and I remember how much they stressed procedures and being careful because of the possibility of lawsuits. This even included stopping to help someone who might be hurt at an accident site where you are not the medical person who will eventually be responsible for this person. I like to think that procedures are there for a reason. Usually it is because something bad has happened and someone hoped that by putting the procedures in place, hopefully no one else will have a negative experience.

Unfortunately it seems that the person who points out problems ends up getting a lot of harassment because of the position they have taken. If you feel in your heart that you have done the right thing, stand by that decision and don't let anyone push you into having severe anxiety and panic attacks over it. Its just not worth it. And you know what else? It always seems like these things blow up over night and six months down the road, no one really remembers what happened. Time has a great way of healing wounds and clearing the air. I feel for you. I've been in the line of fire and attacked for doing the right thing. It hurts. But you must gain strength from knowing that you did the right thing. Take care of yourself!

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Mountaingirl
come forth into the light of things ~ let nature be your teacher. William Wordsworth

Hey

Thank you everso much for the helpful comments and I will take them into account. I have come to the conclusion that I need to let it go and have some peace of mind. I am going to pat myself on the back and know I did the right thing. Thank you guys so much I feel better already

Albertagirl