This lesson should be a breeze. I have taken several Time Management Courses This one of course is very different. I spend much to much time thinking about things that depress me or make me anxious. My first challenge is to stop that. Getting this far has not only confused me but has given my more anxiety. I think it is a test. I can now get the anxiety to move on with some other thoughts and activities. I hate this so much. I want to feel good all the time. I had myself so upset over the weekend again that I was completely exhausted. I worked all day Sat. without stopping, cleaning cages, on my hands and knees washing up floors, things to keep my mind busy and for two days since I have been really tired and physically worn out.
Why do I do that? I know at 77 nearly 78 I can not work like that anymore but I push myself. So, this lesson should be helpful. It better be or I may just wear myself down to nothing. My to do list sometimes looks like I never do anything. I just keep adding and my goals are not attainable in one day. I drive myself too much. Thanks for listening to me ramble. Just had to get it out. I wonder if the frequent returning anxiety is because I have cut my meds down to half of what I was taking?

Barndog,

You are one tough cookie! I tell ya, I hope that when I reach 77 I can be half as active as you!

You have alot on your plate to do around your home, animals to take care of, your home, property...but how about you? Who takes care of you???

I too had a list of things to do in a day that would realistically take 3 to do, and I am 36! I have come to respect that being driven is fine, having goals is great too, but I need to remember to take care of myself, first and foremost, otherwise I will be unable to accomplish what I have set out for myself. What good am I to myself or anyone if I am run down, tired, stressed and overworked? Make sure you take care of you first. Selfish? NO!!!! You are not a piece of machinery that can go to shop and be repaired, you must do this yourself everyday by taking care of yourself with good nutrition, rest, positive thoughts, maybe God or a higher power, meditation and prayer, reading, painting, sewing...whatever you can get lost in that make you feel safe, relaxes, rejuvinates, inspires you. Chores will ALWAYS be there! You must invest some time in taking care of you as well! Take care and God Bless! LizB

Morning LizB: You are so right, I need to take care of myself and I usually do. I have a tendency to schedule too much in one day.Yesterday I was good, I stopped mowing grass after my gang got home from work and they took over and I showered and sat down and enjoyed the evening. I usually keep helping until all is completed but I did not yesterday. I think they understood and they never ask me to help but I just do it to make their lives easier. We have several acres of grass to cut where the Christmas trees are planted plus the several acres we live on. The rest is meadow for the sheep. So, I try and ease their schedules by helping. I do forget my age sometimes and stay on that tractor for 2 and 3 hours, enjoying it I must say, but it makes my back sore sometimes afterwards. I love working outdoors and in the sunshine. They appreciate my help but I know they worry that I do too much. I don't know what I am trying to prove but I am going to slow down one of these days. I am going to finish this lesson tonight and move on. It is amazing how much of the lessons really hits home. You can tell whoever wrote them has been there and done that.
We have a Schnauzer here at the farm. This is our 7th or 8th. She is just a year old and her name is Missy. She and my Jack Russell Terrier are great friends only my dog, Barney, ignors her at times and she really goes after him and tries to make him play. He is 8 and getting old like his Mom. I will talk to you all soon again.

Barndog!

I have been thinking about you.

Hope you are being gentle with yourself and taking it slow. You need to take good care of yourself. Do what you can and take a break sweetie! Slow and easy.

Blessings, LizB

Thank you LizB....I am good. Had a few bad weeks where it was up and down and then it settled down and all has been good. I was happy with Lesson 14 and am spending another few days on it. I bought Lucinda's books and think I will read them when I finish the lessons before I start them over again. I really wonder if anyone was completely "cured" after only doing the lessons one time. I know I will not be, but I am accomplishing my one big goal and that was to try and stop Xanax after Lesson 15. I do not know if I will make it or not but I am only taking 1/2 pill in the morning now. I started with 0.25 mg. 3 x a day.
Now I am just 1/2 of 0.25 one time a day. Not bad for an old lady. I have also been visiting the chat room. Interesting people and fun conversations. I am going to check in on the Lesson 14 group and check them out today. Thanks for thinking of me. God Bless.

Barndog!

I am so happy for you! That is a great accomplishment, weaning down! Take is slow though, do not rush it. It took me 3 months to slowly wean off of Klonopin. I do not take it everyday, not even every other day. I took one .125mg on Tuesday cause I needed to get to sleep and could not. So, if I need to take as needed, so be it. Plus my prednisone is causing anxiety (the heart palps), otherwise I am OK.

I am not sure if one can be cured with a once through. I still refer to the material for review. I think it is good to review now and again, especially the lesson I found more difficult. That is OK. We have to patient and realize that we have been living MANY years in a negative way and this transformation will not be overnight and done when lesson 15 closes. That is ok. We are human, we learn and grow.It will take pratice and time. Remember that you are doing it now, there is no reason you cannot do it later if you need to. You will be just fine Barndog! . Your outlook and attitude are wonderful, you are going to succeed in anything you do.

God Bless you! LizB