will i be able to see and feel the change. will i be able to get back to a normal life. how do i flush out the negatives and incorporate only the positives.

Yes, you will see and feel the changes but they may be so small at first that you might overlook them. Take heart, as you work through the program the changes are already beginning in you. Once you learn about this condition and about yourself you won't be able to go back to the "old" you. Life is an ebb and flow - it is always changing.
Might I suggest you change your user name to something more upbeat? It might help your outlook. In reading your post I hear someone who is actively seeking to improve and recover from this condition. That is a big possitive!!
One step at a time but keep your chin up and keep your feet moving.
God Bless,
Sugar

to sugar thanks for the suggestion about changing my username. i changed it to karen my real name from unhappy. i haven't received my program yet, but i want to ask what will it do for me that the medication may not be able to help with. do you think the program is worth it.

Karen,
Hey! Nice to meet you under your "real" name. The difference between the meds and the program is that the meds without the program only mask the real problem (our way of thinking) and the meds with the program provide the temporary relief needed to settle down and complete the program and make the changes necessary. I completely believe in this program and highly recommend it to everyone!