This conversation started bc i am writting a book about my anxiety, and he said i put fear first, I modified this convo so it wont be so long i took the no important stuff out



James Nolan: What would you rather be
James Nolan: the water
James Nolan: or the dam?
Alisha Stoewer: trick question
Alisha Stoewer: the dam
James Nolan: no it isnt.
James Nolan: there is a real answer
Alisha Stoewer: i would be the dam
James Nolan: why?
Alisha Stoewer: no
Alisha Stoewer: i would be the water
James Nolan: so would I
James Nolan: the water
Alisha Stoewer: bc the dam holds it all in like God and the water floats with it in his hands
James Nolan: water is powerful
James Nolan: but the dam see
James Nolan: is inconsistent
James Nolan: it will eventually
Alisha Stoewer: can break down
James Nolan: and inevitably collapse
James Nolan: water
James Nolan: can defeat ALL things
James Nolan: it floods
James Nolan: expands
James Nolan: becomes vapor
James Nolan: then rain
James Nolan: it is a tidal wave
James Nolan: and a puddle
James Nolan: it is powerful
James Nolan: and weak
James Nolan: friendly
James Nolan: and enemy
James Nolan: it can pass over stones
James Nolan: or wear those same stones into sand
James Nolan: do not be like the stones
James Nolan: be like water
James Nolan: able to adpat to ALL things
James Nolan: many forms
James Nolan: ice
James Nolan: gas
James Nolan: liquid
Alisha Stoewer: food
James Nolan: precisely.
James Nolan: water has no fear
James Nolan: and why should it?
James Nolan: it understands that if there is a turn in the road
James Nolan: it adapts and follows the turn
James Nolan: if there is a fall
Alisha Stoewer: it will go woth it
James Nolan: it falls
James Nolan: exactly
James Nolan: so be water.
James Nolan: not the dam
James Nolan: not the stones
James Nolan: and not the poor bastards who drown in it
James Nolan: be water.
Alisha Stoewer: lol
James Nolan: the current of life
James Nolan: is strong
James Nolan: you can be the dam who resists it
James Nolan: built on fear
Alisha Stoewer: and u have to have water
James Nolan: and when overpowering forces outside of your control
James Nolan: break you
James Nolan: you will wish
James Nolan: they had just washed over you
James Nolan: all things in the past
James Nolan: are in the past
James Nolan: as water moves forward
Alisha Stoewer: it just keeps going
James Nolan: it etches a river behind it
James Nolan: but it still moves forward
James Nolan: never back
Alisha Stoewer: its so hard to be so strong, i am only human tho
James Nolan: its not hard to be strong
James Nolan: its hard to not be weak
James Nolan: because weakness
James Nolan: is easier
James Nolan: lazier
Alisha Stoewer: guess i am pretty strong
James Nolan: requires less of us
James Nolan: you're amazing
James Nolan: I've said it from day one
James Nolan: Today
James Nolan: is the day
James Nolan: you recognize
James Nolan: you can do whatever you want
James Nolan: and then
James Nolan: work on clearing the fog
James Nolan: turn up the temp
Alisha Stoewer: trust me i have recognized it many times
James Nolan: become a little selfish
James Nolan: yes
James Nolan: but today is the day
James Nolan: you don't back down.
Alisha Stoewer: i act on it
James Nolan: Today is the day
James Nolan: YOU ARE VICTORIOUS
James Nolan: so be water
James Nolan: remember
James Nolan: this one thing
James Nolan: a single drop of water will over a hundred years
James Nolan: form a stalactite in a cave
James Nolan: those stone teeth on the cielings
James Nolan: and floor
James Nolan: water makes those
James Nolan: one drop at a time
James Nolan: builds pillars
James Nolan: a single
James Nolan: weak
James Nolan: drop of water.
James Nolan: so now you have had your first REAL lesson
James Nolan: be like water.
James Nolan: when you learn to be like water
James Nolan: I will teach you how to be like bamboo.
Alisha Stoewer: ok
James Nolan: you can pollute water
James Nolan: poison it
James Nolan: but you cannot destroy it
James Nolan: and eventually
James Nolan: whether filtered
James Nolan: or just through time
James Nolan: it cleans itself out.
Alisha Stoewer: so true
James Nolan: You just broke the dam.
Alisha Stoewer: lol]
James Nolan: I could easily tell you how to clear some of that fog
James Nolan: but I think I'll ask you instead
James Nolan: what is fog?
Alisha Stoewer: ?
Alisha Stoewer: water
James Nolan: precisely
James Nolan: its a cloud
James Nolan: its vapor
James Nolan: the same thing that could help you
James Nolan: you have let become your prison
James Nolan: to clear the fog
James Nolan: becoem water
James Nolan: not the stone inside it
James Nolan: that isnt a step
James Nolan: thats a damned leap
James Nolan: a bound
James Nolan: a jump to the moon
James Nolan: and a realistic one
James Nolan: do you know what the rain sees as it falls to the earth?
James Nolan: the rain sees EVERYTHING on the way down
James Nolan: it knows where it will fall
James Nolan: and it falls.
James Nolan: fearlessly
James Nolan: does not worry about drying up
James Nolan: or soaking into the ground
James Nolan: when you stop fighting the current of life
James Nolan: you become part of that current
James Nolan: be water.
James Nolan: when you are water.
James Nolan: become bamboo
James Nolan: when you are bamboo
James Nolan: be electricity
James Nolan: each has their own power
James Nolan: when you are electricity, become air.
James Nolan: bamboo cannot be destroyed you know
Alisha Stoewer: i kno
James Nolan: if even the TINIEST
James Nolan: bit of root is left
James Nolan: it regrows
James Nolan: it thrives on very little
James Nolan: and requires no maintenance
Alisha Stoewer: ok well dont get into that yet
Alisha Stoewer: let me be water first
James Nolan: Yes
James Nolan: be water.
James Nolan: you already broke the dam
James Nolan: water is ice. water is snow. water is vapor, and water is glaciers
James Nolan: it is tsunamis
James Nolan: that destroy entire countries
James Nolan: it buried ALL of new orleans beneath it
James Nolan: it gives life
James Nolan: it takes life away
James Nolan: it gives food
Alisha Stoewer: water is God
James Nolan: and feeds it
James Nolan: IRonically
Alisha Stoewer: part of God anyway
James Nolan: not exactly
James Nolan: God made water
James Nolan: because he is greater than it.
Alisha Stoewer: thats what i mean
James Nolan: yes but imagine that
James Nolan: to control water
James Nolan: you cant
James Nolan: but you do the next best thing
James Nolan: become it.
James Nolan: when you become water
James Nolan: you are no longer fighting the current
James Nolan: you are part of a powerful force
James Nolan: that what began as a trickle
James Nolan: became a wave

my therapist says that I need to be more fluid and less rigid. She says to think of myself as water. The dam is rigid, and so is anxiety. Learning to live witout anxiety means being more fluid when life stands in your way, like a dam. Water just finds another way out eventually.

I think we half to remember foremost that this program is not about eliminating anxiety because we can't, but it is about learning to cope and control or reaction to anxiety. It is working for me, I can positively see instances that I stopped the anxiety from keeping me from doing something and accually did it. And in my case it save me money. And the fluid aspect of water vs. the fixture of a dam is that you must recognize the anxiety as just a reminder to pay attention it can be there to help you. I an happy that everytime when I pick up a power saw my anxiety says FINGER CHECK!!! I just check to make sure my fingers are out of the way an a cutting I will go...