Hi everyone,

Here is a quote i relate to SO well ~

"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer, but wish we didn't."
Erica Jong

I admit it ~ that's me, too much of the time.
What that quote means to me, is that very often...when i'm still talking about a problem, or praying about it, or saying i'm not sure what to do.....the Truth is: I already KNOW what i need to do, and am too fearful to act on that knowledge. Can anyone else relate to this?

I KNOW what my God-given instincts tell me!
I KNOW where my intuition is leading me!
I KNOW it will be painful to act on certain decisions......and yet, with some areas of my life, i act as if i don't know what to do...because i am still not ready (still denying) to FACE the painful truth! Anyone else?

Have a great day!
Love,
Lindaloo

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Linda

That quote fits the majority of all who come here.I guess what we are asking for is reassurance in our beliefs-our true beliefs.The ones we know we have to do to get over our conditions.I know that looms over our heads all the time we are working on our conditions.You posted in the right lesson;THE COURAGE TO CHANGE.This was an anxiety producing lesson for me.It's a lesson you can't tip-toe around.It's the one that gives you the information and hints to open the gate or door and step through.It's the one also that we leave our negativity behind.I held on to it for so long that I knew no other way to live.With the program I was able to do just what I was scared to do.I stepped through that door and trusted my strengths and skills and it is still working.Time and practice.It is a little unfamiliar on the other side of the door but it's nice.That quote is so true for alot of us.Thanks for sharing it and I wish you the best when you decide to step through.You have a great day too.

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Tim

Hi lindi!

Great quote! If I am understanding what you are saying, we are acting 'as if' we don't know what to do... because we are in denial? I'm not sure about not being ready to move on--Are you/I waiting for the anxiety/panic to go away first? We know that's NOT going to happen!

Set me straight please!
rhythm

-"Music is the lanquage of the soul."

As one of my favorite Looney Tune characters said,

"I don't like pain. It hurts me."

Now when I can remember which one said it, I'll let you know. They are all my favorite.

Things are painful when we face them, but is hiding from facing them more painful?

We know it is. I do the same thing. Like I'm waiting til I feel I'm ready to tackle it. But its hard to know if I'm waiting til I'm ready or just putting it off. I guess waiting is putting it off. Ok, see, I just answered my own question. You are so right.

Reena

Hi Tim, Rhythm, and Reena,

Just came in from my usual 'little' walk in the area...lovely day here in Toronto, and by the way: Happy Easter Sunday!

Tim, Yes, i agree, we ALL need to ask for help and reassurance re: the anxiety/panic. I should have written that i wasn't referring to the panic. I was talking about areas in my own life, where i know what i need to do and i continue to remain 'stuck' because of the fear of taking some specific action. (i.e. leaving a relationship).

As you said, 'trusting' and having faith is what it's all about...taking those leaps into the unknown, opening the doors that i KNOW lead me to where i REALLY DO want to go!

Thank's for writing Tim,
God bless,
Lindi

Hi Rhythm, Well, i really didn't explain myself too well, i'm sorry. I can see why you got confused, thinking that i was speaking of anxiety/panic,etc..

What i meant was ~ often i will pray for guidance in a certain area of my life, earnestly wanting to KNOW what i need to do if i'm the least bit unsure, and i ALWAYS somehow discover the reply to that prayer. So...there it is....what i need to do! And do i ACT on that knowledge? Often, i do not.
I feel too afraid and so i don't take any action. And here is where that 'quote' came in.....I keep praying for advice, asking another for advice, talking about something that i ALREADY HAVE THE ANSWER TO! I just haven't wanted to listen to it! Haven't wanted to deal with what i must feel in order to move forward.

Good to see you, 2 ~ 4
Take care,
Lindi

Hi Reena,

How's the kitty doing?
Well, you knew what i meant, didn't you! And that looney tune character said it exactly: "I don't like the pain, it hurts me." As they would say today ~ "duh! Like yeah...so it hurts, but move on dude!" SO OBVIOUS! I live in a part of this city where i am surrounded with young ones who talk this way all the time!

Anyway yes...of course 'hiding' is ALSO painful, it's between a rock and a hard place, and in certain areas of my life, i have always chosen the rock! Not ALL areas, just very specific ones. I want to change that NOW!!!!!! The 'hard place' ( i know from experience) is soooo much better....even though it hurts there, at the same time as the pain...there is also a fabulous strength and feeling of empowerment, from having listened to myself and acted on my 'knowing'.

Thank's for writing Reena,
God bless,
Lindi

My kids corrected me...

It was Daffy and he said, "I'm not like other people. I can't stand pain, it hurts me!"

Ok, same message, duh!

It is amazing at how much we dislike change that we are willing to stay in pain so we can be in a familiar place.

Happy Easter to you too and all your 'dude' neighbors.

Kitty is well. Its funny, before he would be shy and not like to be bothered too much(unless HE wanted attention) but now he is enjoying the attention. He isn't even running from my two year old! lol
Now I should throw my bossy cat out for a week!!! LOL. No, that was just a joke. He just needs an attitude adjustment since Bulls eye came back. I dolike having my lap kitty home.

Take care, Reena

Hi Reena,

Oh! So it was good old Daffy Duck who said that! I used to love all those cartoons...probably still would if i got the stations, but got rid of all cable t.v. a few years ago....i was watching much too much!

Yes, it is AMAZING how much discomfort we are able to endure in the name of familiarity! A friend of mine (a psychotherapist) said to me just a couple of weeks ago "You have such a high pain threshhold Linda!" And that is the way in which he meant it. That somehow i can endure so much that is 'wrong' for me, rather than take that flying leap of faith! As i said before, i want this lifelong habit to change, NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okey dokey, off to make dinner,
God bless,
Lindaloo

Hey lindi!

Thanks for setting me straight! Ya' know you are somewhat difficult to reply to because you know so much!!! I will do my best to try and help tho- So, it's the 'no pain, no gain', same ole' song...IF it is a relationship could it be--'too good to leave, but too bad to stay'? Whatever the case, I know you'd share more if you chose to. Have you ever wrote down 'the problem' and tried to solve it all by yourself? That brings you back to being your 'safe-person'. Being able to tackle something alone is a major step in self-empowerment. That is a sense of freedom and security that is unequaled! Do you already know that? If so- I'm reminding you! SO- you have to take a risk and anticipate a change for the better! You see- I don't know if I'm telling you anything you haven't already heard...To answer your topic tho-you bet I can relate!

BTW-I think you are sounding much better!
Happy Easter Sunday to you too!
rhythm

Hi Rhythm,

Thank you for reminding me of that sense of freedom and security that comes from having tackled something on my own....that comes from having LISTENED and ACTED ON my instincts! It doesn't matter that i know this already....i need to hear it, again and again.

You said something about it being difficult to respond to what i say, cause i 'know too much'. I have to admit...i felt a bit uneasy reading that, cause i'm not sure what you meant. Did you truly MEAN that, or was there an edge of sarcasm? I needed to ask. I always like communicating with you, and want to know if there's anything about me that holds you back from responding.
**It may have been absolutely unnecessary for me to check this out with you, but i think it's a far better thing to do, then to just 'assume' (on my part, i mean).

Okey dokey, off to live another day!
God bless,
Lindaloo

Oh my gosh lindi!

I am so sorry you thought that what I wrote could have been sarcastic! I guess if I was a newcomer here I could see why you would think that tho- I SINCERELY MEANT EVERY WORD! I want to do whatever I can to support and encourage you...If there is anything in holding me back from responding to you, the only thing is... that I want to tell you something you haven't heard! But, then again you are right about reminders. Let me know if there is any other way I can help-- please! You mean alot to me!!!

(((((((((((hugs))))))))))))
love,
rhythm

I'm with you on this one Lindi. Last week when I went through an anxious period (which you guys helped me get through) before I had even thought it through I found myself dialing my psychiatrist. I remember leaving the message with the nurse "Um...I don't know what I'm really looking for from you...I guess just validation that I am going to be alright."

Sheesh what was up with that? The nurse did phone me at home later that afternoon and she has such a soothing voice. She simply asked me if the edge had gone away from my anxiety and by that time it had.

AND hey - Reena - I'm going to have to search for the post about the located cat.

Shawn.

Hi Rhythm,

Oh, now "I" feel badly! But ya know, i just had to ask! Now i understand exactly what you meant when you said that 'i know too much'. You want to be able to tell me SOMETHING that i don't already know! I get it, i really do. Honestly...i do, i do, i do! And actually, that's so sweet of you.
I know that sometimes i can be a hard person to help, since i'm a strange combination of things! This came home to me recently when the head psychologist of a school for training (training new therapists) said he couldn't fix me up with a student therapist, because i knew far more than they did! Did i feel good about that? Nope! Really frustrated! Here i am, a certified counsellor,etc.....who STILL hasn't been able to work through and overcome agoraphobia! GO FIGURE!!!

Anyway, like i said, i always need to hear what just might help, over and over again. And you're ALWAYS supportive!

Bye for now...keep up that beat 2~4

me

Hi Shawn,

I think it's wonderful that you called for reassurance. And even more beautiful, is that she called you back to ask how you were!
Asking for that sort of thing is healthy, i feel.

What i really meant was about when i ask for some advice, when i really do know the answer but don't LIKE what it is! lol Like if i KNOW i shouldn't be in a certain relationship, but for whatever reason i find i can't get myself to sever the tie with that person, then i can keep talking about it, asking for advice,etc... but i already KNOW what i need to know, just wish that 'what i knew' was different! Cause it's SO HARD to act on it. See what i mean?

So, if you need to reach out to call someone to help calm you, i think it's a good thing that you're willing to do that!

I hope you and i both become free from fear...the sooner the better,

((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))
Linda