HI EVERYONE!! I FINISHED THE AUDIO PROGRAM 6MONTHS AGO. I STILL FIND IT VERY DIFFICULT TO DRIVE ALONE, AND JUST BEING ALONE. I DO RECALL THE DAYS THAT I LOVED DRIVING BY MYSELF, AND GOING PLACES BY MYSELF, AND I SO LONG TO GET BACK TO THAT STATE AGAIN. I AM LEARNING TO RE-PARENT MY-SELF, AND TALK MY WAY TO A BETTER SELF-ESTEEM. I AM GUTTING MYSELF OUT OF ALL NEGATIVE WORDS THAT WAS SPOKEN TO ME, FROM FAMILY MEMBERS, AND AT THIS POINT I JUST NEED TO KNOW THAT I WILL BE OK!!!! AS I TAKE THIS LEAP OF FAITH TO DRIVE ALONE AGAIN.I AM AT A POINT IN MY LIFE WHERE I WANT TO CHANGE MY BEHAVIOR PATTERNS. NOT BEING ABLE TO DRIVE BY MYSELF HAS LIMITED ME FROM DOING THE THINGS THAT I NEED TO DO ON A DAILY BASES. ANY RESPONSE WOULD BE HELPFUL

Timothy,
Im glad you finished the program 6 months ago. But, we dont ever actually finish the program , we continiue practicing with all the tools and skills the program has given us the rest of our lives, at least i will. YES, you will be okay!! Because you now have what you need to continue working through whatever your fears are. It may not be comfortable, or easy, but you continue doing them till they are no longer a problem. ITs just like reading and writing. Once you learn how, you continually practice to be better equiped to do it. Same way with healing and recovering from panic/anxiety. NEVER stop using the precious tools we have. Take CareNelly

Hi, Timothy. I just wanted to give a word of support. You will be OK. You can do this! Nelly's advice is great, and I hope you will take it to heart.

THANK YOU BOTH, FOR RESPONDING TO MY POST. I WILL TAKE YOUR ADVICE, AND CONTINUE TO WORK, AND PRATICE THE PROGRAM. I WILL KEEP TELLING MYSELF: I'M GOING TO BE OK. I ALSO REALIZE THAT I WAS AFRAID OF THE PANICKY FEELINGS THAT I WAS FEELING. SO THANKS AGAIN FOR THE SUPPORT.

TIM

Hi Timothy.
Fear is the lack of faith. Let go and let God. What helps me is to say the Serenity prayer.

"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference".

Good luck and take care.

Dennis

HI DENNIS.
THANKS SO MUCH FOR THE POST. I'VE BEEN PRAYING THAT I WOULD WALK MORE IN FAITH. I DO REALIZE THAT ACCORDING TO II TIMOTHY 1:7; THAT GOD DID NOT GIVE US THE SPIRIT OF FEAR, BUT OF POWER, AND OF LOVE, AND A SOUND MIND. THE CONCLUSION THAT I HAVE JUST RECENTLY CAME TO IS: THAT I HAD A PROBLEM WITH MY LOVE FACTOR. LET ME EXPLAIN. WHEN I WAS A LITTLE BOY, I WALKED IN ON MY FATHER MOLESTING MY SISTER. (I CONSIDERED THIS HORRIBLE ACT RAPE). AND TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE WHEN MY FATHER REALIZED I WALKED IN AND SAW WHAT WAS GOING ON HE BEAT ME AND MY OTHER SIBLINGS SERVERELY. THEN HE LOCKED US IN A BEDROOM, AND WENT BACK AND FINISHED WHAT HE WAS DOING TO MY SISTER. WHEN I WAS A PRE-TEEN I AGAIN WALK IN ON ANOTHER FAMILY MEMBER WHICH WAS A MALE, MOLESTING ANOTHER MALE. I YELLED AT HIM AND BEGAN TO FIGHT HIM UNTIL HE STOPPED WHAT HE WAS DOING. I SAID ALL OF THAT TO SAY THIS: I DIDN'T TRUST PEOPLE. I WAS ALWAYS SUSPIOUS OF THEIR MOTIVES, I ALWAYS HAD MY GUARD UP, I WAS ALWAYS UPTIGHT ABOUT EVERYTHING, AND I ALWAYS FELT LIKE A SCREW-UP, BECAUSE OF ALL OF THE STUFF THAT I WALKED IN ON, NOT TO MENTION THAT I MYSELF, WAS ALSO MOLESTED AS A CHILD. I AM JUST REALLY REALIZING THAT NONE OF THIS IS MY FAULT. I HAVE FORGIVEN ALL OF THOSE THAT WERE INVOLED IN THIS. BUT NOW I'M JUST WORKING ON ME!!! I WANT TO NOW FEEL COMFORTABLE WITH ME. I HAVE TOLD MYSELF SUBCONCIOUSLY THAT I CAN'T TRUST PEOPLE, AND EVEN GOD, BUT THAT IS A LIE THAT I WILL NO-LONGER TELL MYSELF. I HAVE WENT TO GOD AND ASKED HIM TO FORGIVE ME FOR HOW I FELT, AND I DO BELIEVE THAT HE HAS FORGIVEN ME. I USE TO ASK GOD WHY DID HE ALLOW THIS TO HAPPEN, BUT NOW I REALIZED THAT GOD HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS HORRIBLE ORDEAL. THIS WAS THE RESULT OF PERVERTED PEOPLE WHO WERE BROKEN THEMSELVES. SO NOW I AM SO READY TO BE WHOLE AGAIN. AND I WANT TO BREAK THAT OLD HABIT OF MISTRUST.

THANKS FOR YOUR SUPPORT.

TIM

HI, I used to have a very hard time driving as well, it seemed to be a blend of a lot of my fears like being trapped, in public, away from my safe place, etc. I found the program at www.drivingfear.com to be very a HUGE help in overcoming this fear and now Id don't have any problems with it at all. That program and Lucinda's are the two best I've found. They come at it from two different angles, both of which are valuable. You can get over it, I promise.

Hi, Timothy.

You're right to face your situation. There is, in my opinion, no other way around.

Actually, your fear of driving and mistrust of people may be much the same thing. I was in a car accident once where everything was fine right up until the moment preceding impact. There was no warning. Friends were gracious enough to offer a ride to work the next week... but if I looked ahead out the windshield every time another oncoming car got within 'range' I started screaming. I feel that way now with something in my life that is similar to your childhood situations. There was no warning. I trusted, and people let me down.

Well, like with recovery after the car accident, I find myself doing some uncontrollable shrieking and some awfully heavy breathing. But the idea is to get myself through it. Yes, anything can happen next time a car or loved one is within range, but just breathe through it. Stare at it. Confront it. Learn from it. Conquer it.

I'm not through this and I know you probably won't be either. But it IS possible. We can't live our whole lives in horror and morbid anticipation. It's OK to let go.

Try it. Keep at it. You'll be OK. I promise.

Yours...