Does anyone relates to Mike's story in lesson 2, He is a minister and he started to worry about if the person that he was dating was the perfect wife,,, does any one has gone through this, because that is what happens to me, I was dating someone and all this anxiety came because I was to worry wether he was the right guy....I feel so impotent b/c I do want to get marry but then those obsesive thought about what if? he is the right guy, what if I stay by my self?....has any one gone through this...

Actually I do have the same thing going on..I have been w/my boyfriend for 2 1/2 years and for about the last 1 1/2 years I have been obsessing about whether or not he's the right person. I quit taking medication about a year into the relationship b/c of the sexual side effects it was causing so of course I started having anxiety again. I was trying to find something to blame my anxiety on so I figued it was him, and ever since I have been freaking about it. Sometimes I think about ending the relationship in hopes that it will relieve some of my anxiety and then I realize that I've had this all my life and that I'm just trying to find something to blame it on. In actuality, I'm so lucky to have someone like him, he has been very patient with me and the things I go through and even though sometimes a relationship seems like extra stress, in my case I think I would possibly be making the biggest mistake of my life by leaving him. It all depends on the situation but I think our anxiety causes us to see relationships as a stressor and feel the need to rid ourselves of it.

I thought about a few more things I wanted to say about this because its a big issue for me as well. I know that the reason that I stress over it is because thinking about spending my entire future with someone is hard when I don't even know how I'm going to feel from day to day. I think about all the things that are involved in a relationship...getting married, having kids...and it scares me to think about how I will deal with all of these things and if I will be able to handle them. So for me, I know its my anxiety that's giving me the doubt. If this program helps, hopefully I will see these things as enjoyable and not as hurdles.

I am the exact same way and I agree with DEEP THINKER. How will I deal with everything that comes with a relationship? Does he really accept me even thought I have anxiety or is he going to decide he doesn't want to deal with it and bail (that's my big one). I just have to keep reminding myself that most of this stuff is in my head and that it's up to me to reprogram myself with positive thinking.

Thank you for getting back, I thought I was the only one going through this, I have ended two relashionships because of my anxiety, so I decided to go to the program and get a personal coach, I am a little anxious about the money issue, but I have expended so much money in therapy and doctors, that I thought that this may be a great investment, I don't want to end up by my self... and I want to get rid of those obsesssive thought....thank you and good luck