Hi. My name is Mark. I am currently working through Lesson 5. My first anxiety attack occurred 8 years ago. Like everybody else, I didn't know what it was and only recently determined that the symptoms I felt were a panic attack. I have taken BuSpar on and off over the last 5 years and Ativan as needed. Generally, the BuSpar keeps my anxiety in check but in the last two months I have had some major stress in my work life and the anxiety just got out of control. I had heard Lucinda's radio commercials for more than a year and every time I heard it, I would turn the radio down or off thinking "right, like you've got all the answers". Talk about negative thinking. A little more than a month ago I was so desperate for relief that I called the 800 number and ordered the course. Within two weeks one of my friends commented on how much less edgy I seemed; I realized that I was feeling better and better able to manage my generalized anxiety & panic attacks. The encouragement felt great. Now here's my question. Sometimes scary thoughts creep into my mind like "I'm gonna kill myself". To calm myself I say "I'm scaring myself, it's a negative thought, it's so unrealistic, i love life". The thought still creeps in. Since I'm in lesson 5, I am wondering if it's ok to listen to Lesson 10 to see what advice is offered. The ironic thing is: I never ever had thoughts of hurting myself, but when my first therapist asked the general question "have you ever thought of hurting yourself" it seemed to stick in my mind and it pops up when I get really anxious.
So...is it ok to advance to Lesson 10, and does anybody have any tips on booting this scary thought from my mind? Thanks so much for responding.

Dear Mark:

I have had those thoughts my self from time to time. I would go to the therapist and tell him I was afraid of dying and his responce was "well everyone is afraid of that" he just didn't get it. Any way I don't think it's a good idea to skip a head, at least that is what it says in the program. If I were you I would treat it as just another panic attack, because essencialy, that's all it is. I relize that it does fall into the catogory of obsesive scary thoughts but obsesive scary thoughts are just an anxiety disorder just like all the others.

My advice to you (and trust me, I'm speaking from experience) is not to give these thoughts a whole lot of attention. I know that sounds diffucult, but the reason they keep coming is simply becaue you're afraid of them and fear breeds intrest. The more you say to yourself that these thoughts are not going to manifest so I'll just let them happen for the time being and not give them one ounce of attention, the sooner they go away. In other words the less fear and energy you put into them the less fuel you give them.

Hope this Helps

Mellie

quote:

Originally posted by mellie:
Dear Mark:

I have had those thoughts my self from time to time. I would go to the therapist and tell him I was afraid of dying and his responce was "well everyone is afraid of that" he just didn't get it. Any way I don't think it's a good idea to skip a head, at least that is what it says in the program. If I were you I would treat it as just another panic attack, because essencialy, that's all it is. I relize that it does fall into the catogory of obsesive scary thoughts but obsesive scary thoughts are just an anxiety disorder just like all the others.

My advice to you (and trust me, I'm speaking from experience) is not to give these thoughts a whole lot of attention. I know that sounds diffucult, but the reason they keep coming is simply becaue you're afraid of them and fear breeds intrest. The more you say to yourself that these thoughts are not going to manifest so I'll just let them happen for the time being and not give them one ounce of attention, the sooner they go away. In other words the less fear and energy you put into them the less fuel you give them.

Hope this Helps

Mellie

Mellie,

Thanks for responding. My scary thoughts were practically non-existent today and my anxiety was at a wonderful low. I know the two must be connected. So I will continue to give myself positive messages whenever I have scary thoughts.

Mark

I totally can relate. Someone in our town did just that took his life. Ever since then I couldn't get it out of my mind. What if I did that oh what if I was so out of it like him. Its the most awful feeling. Anytime I hear something to that effect I get anxiety feelings, its weird.

Whats the most important lesson you've learned to cope with the scary thoughts??? What helps the best??

I'm floating through the thoughts and that is definitely helping.

I'm so glad you posted that and the responses are great!! I can't even talk about it, or say it, it totally freaks me out!!

This scary thought is my biggest problem.

Thanx for listening