This is my scariest thought, I was doing well just a week ago then wham depression has hit me hard. Daily living is a struggle and my obsession is what if I never feel normal again. This thought really puts me in a panic with nowhere to turn. Can anyone relate or offer support or advice.

I am on antidepressant serzone for the last three months and i've had a lot of ups and downs but this seems to be the worst and scariest.

I can definitely relate. On the days I feel anxious I have to really talk to myself and convince myself that I have been doing really good and it is just a low day where I need to go and take a walk (which I do) and make sure that I am eating right and then within a day or two I am feeling OK.

I think the more good days we have the more we will be able to handle the not-so-good days.

You are not alone!

Betsy

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Always Hopeful, Betsy H.
Marietta, GA (East Cobb)

Hi Hope, I know from experience that the kind of thought, "will i ever feel normal again" is a PART of feeling depressed. Once, about 7 years ago, i became chronically depressed (as they say)....for an entire year and a bit....it was easy for me to see, later on, how this happened. But DURING that time (which i realize is an extreme example) i had no idea whether or not i would EVER emerge out of this state.I was almost non-functional. I had many horrifying thoughts, but mostly an inability to move, talk, smile, or care about anything at all. Feeling depressed, whether extreme or mild, can SEEM neverending. After a whole year of refusing to take medication (because i had previously suffered a nightmarish withdrawal from a 7-yr. addiction to valium) i agreed to take an anti-depressent, Zoloft. It's supposed to take many weeks to have an effect, but for me....within a few days, the very worst of it (that black hole) 'lifted'!! I was on that pill for 8 months, during which time i made many changes. I had no withdrawal at all from that drug, although some people do. Is what you are taking working for you? Has it helped feeling depressed to a significant degree? (some people have to try a few) If and when i now feel depression sweeping over me (as in: last week for a few days) i KNOW that these thoughts and feelings will not last very long...i know how to allow it to 'just be there'. At this point, i can usually 'see' how i got to feeling that way...either from how i'd been thinking or what i'd been believing or concentrating on, or else...in working the lessons of this program, alot of feelings often arise which i haven't dealt with for a long time, and i just need to feel them. You WILL NOT stay that way! Can you try to use self-talk for the 'what if' thought??? I do know how difficult it can be to APPLY yourself, when feeling depressed. Can you trace back to what was going on inside of your head, before depression came on? If you have the energy, maybe try to write....just write whatever emerges...it can be a great tool, rather than getting lost in your head. Be really good and gentle with yourself, take a break from whatever you feel you REALLY can't handle right now. Maybe one of these suggestions can help. God bless you and please let us know how you are doing. love....Lindi

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Linda

Dear Hope

I know that I have those days when I just feel yucky! I get very depressed and I feel like nothing really matters. It is hard to just get up and get going.

However, there is something you can do about it. The thing that has really worked for me is to just let myself feel how I feel. DON'T ADD WHAT IFS. No matter how icky you feel you need to just go about your business and let it happen. Depression has a funny way of lifting if you don't pay too much attention to it. This is easier said than done, it takes some practice. But what you need to keep in mind is that the reason people get depressed is because we put un due stress on our brains with negative thinking. The more you think negative, such as what if it doesn't go away, the longer it hangs around. In other words, you are adding fuel to the fire every time you say to yourself "what if it doesn't go away". It will go away much quicker if you "RELAX TOWARD IT, LEAN INTO IT, and LET IT HAPPEN. Tell yourself "okay, I feel icky and depressed right now but I'm going to go about my bussiness the best I can, let it sweep over me and do it's worst. Treat it excaxtly as you would a panic attack. Let it sweep over you and eventually it will pass. Do not add the what if's or the oh my goodnesses, this will only make it stronger and last longer. You would be surprised at how you can take the edge off by changing your thinking toward it. Next time you feel this way try telling yourself things like "It's just brain tiredness, it's normal under the circumstances, it can't hurt me all it can do is make me feel icky for the time being". "If I just let it do its worst and not worry that it is going to last forever, because it NEVER DOES", it will go away alot quicker and it won't be quite as terrible if it happens again. Each time it won't last as long and it won't seem quite so terrible. Just like anxiety, the less afraid if it you are, the less it happens and it eventually goes away.

Good Luck, Mellie