I'm about to go through a major change in my life. You see...I'm a male and have had a high pitched voice since teen years and have had problems with it cracking and fading and I decided I wanted to get rid of that. Well to make a long story short I went to a speech pathologist who said my voice should be alot LOWER to get rid of the pitch breaks...I'm EXTREMELY USED to my voice being high because I associate with a more feminine demeanor....ok I know I'm going all psychoanalytical here but this ties into 2 VERY TRAUMATIC experiences as a child in which my mother was practically the main one who did anything about them...I think this is why I view women as very strong and admirable...but not so much for men.

I'm afraid to let go of this voice because I feel like I'm "being taken away from the safety of a mothers love"...I still havent resolved that issue from childhood...Although I am in counseling for this. When this new realization came about..I got so anxious and that spacey feeling came...I know it's just anxiety but I found myself singing to myself in my mind "somebody bring me back to reality"...I sounded like a mental patient but I could'nt help it , this is scaring me so much...sometimes I get the urge to just do something really dangerous like run into a wall or something cause I'm so frustrated.

I jump at the littlest things. I'm thinking this may also be due in part to this ADD medication I'm taking which is a STIMULANT, I take paxil and my dr said paxil magnifies the effect of ADD meds so we have to be careful. I did just increase my paxil dose so it would make sense. Im getting the jitters even when I'm not thinking of something scary...

Sorry for rambling on...I'm just not feeling
well and needed to vent. I think I'll be ok.
If anyone has any thoughts on this please post
back

I think it would be important to talk with your counselor about this. It sounds as if you have some very strong attachments to the "voice" and what it represents to you...I would work through this with someone wise/expert in this area.

I wish you well, Carolyn