Hi everyone,
I am 30 years old and have been married to a wonderful man (who is 35) since last spring.
I have never had a child, but my husband very much wants us to have one soon.
I have been reading books about how to have a successful pregnancy experience (by minimizing fears) but even the most reassuring books I read still leave my stomach in knots and my whole being consumed with anxiety.
I have been diagnosed with GAD in the past, have had panic attacks while driving (lessening now, but not completely gone), and tend to do a lot of catastrophic thinking. Plus, when I was a baby, I was born 3 months premature, so growing up, I always heard these horror stories of how I "took everyone for a ride" though I did manage to survive the odds.
Meanwhile, I just don't know if I can handle being pregnant. I am scared at the prospect of something going wrong, and also am scared at the reality of the actual delivery itself. Right now, even the smallest bodily symptoms that seem "off" to me tend to push me into at least mild anxiety (eventually, this at times turns into full-blown panic). I feel like I am a prisoner to panic. I am particularly frightened of the notion of traumatic medical experiences (which is what delivery could be).
There are people, like my sister, who had two children using hynobirthing, and reassures me that delivery is "no big deal" and she basically used "mind over matter" (she doesn't have anxiety like I do, though)...On one hand, I feel like I'm cheating myself (and my husband, who very much wants biological children)...because of my fears. But is it fair to put myself through something as major as a pregnancy when I suffer so much anxiety about it? I would like to think the process could go as smoothly as my sister's did for her, but there is no guarantee. In short, I really don't know if I can handle the physical reality of it.
Does anyone have any thoughts, advice, or has anyone had these same thoughts? If so, how did you get past them?

Hello! I feel the same way that you do. I'm 26 years old, and I would like to have a baby sometime. I've been married for 2 years to a wonderful man, who also wants a child. I am petrified that my body just cannot handle it. I constantly feel as though my heart will give out, or that I will die during delivery. I recognize that this is my anxiety taking over, but it's hard to get past it. I share your feelings!

Hi

I've had these same concerns although I'm not trying to have a baby any time soon. But I know I want a family one day and worry about how my hormones will affect my emotions and whether I'd go through depression after delivery. Its all fear. I do think you should work on yourself for a little while longer to gain some more strength and then work through your fears of pregnancy and just go for it when you are a little more ready. Get some more anxiety skills under your belt. Eventually you will have to "just do it" like Nike says.

I'm kinda in the same boat as you...I'm petrified and being pregnant and giving birth, but at the same time I really, really want to have a baby and have a little family with my husband.

I'm 39, so for me, it's now or never!

Hi! I'm actually almost 5 months pregnant and I, too, have GAD. The panic isn't an issue anymore, but it certainly was a few years ago. I've slowly gotten less afraid of them and now they don't happen.
My fears lie in how I'll do emotionally afterwards. Lack of sleep tends to increase my GAD so I know I'll be suceptible for emotional ups and downs.
Here's what I did to make the decision to try and have a baby. It was a hugh decision and one that scared me silly. I wanted to adopt instead, but my husband really wanted his own naturally. Once it happens, there's no going back! yikes! So, here's my advice:
Make certain you talk, talk, talk about it to your husband; the pros and cons and share your fears. Talk to your counselor/therapist and get their honest opinion. Pray about it; a lot! If you have faith in Christ, know that He'll give you the confidence to make the best decision.
Don't rush into it. If you have weighed it all and feel more strongly that it's worth the fear, then "just do it"! Don't forget that you WILL have moments of "oh crap, what was I thinking?" etc., and you'll be scared, but we always get stronger when we walk into the wall of fear, even when it doesn't feel like it right away.
Be patient. Be open. Be honest with yourself.
All the best! I finish out this post and I feel my little one kick inside my belly! (by the way, feeling it makes me excited and nervous at the same time and that's normal!)