I am posting this in two places.
My anxiety is over dying before my son is able to care for himself.
I have heart palpitations. Doc ran an ECG for 2 seconds and said I'm normal.
I don't know which comes first.
The anxiety or the palpitations.
I am nearly convinced I will drop one day at a young age of a heart defect I never knew about.
I can NOT bear the thought of not being here to raise my children.
Of course I worry about him dying too, but not as much.
Has anyone else coped with these feelings?

There is not a thing that your feeling that I have not stressed over! I too have heart palputations. I also have two young childern that I worry about.I can assure you that the palputations are not going to kill you. I have lived in fear of them for many years now. I was told by my dr. that it was a result of stress. I DID NOT take her at her word. How could she be sure? She gave me an EKG such as you. That wasn't enough! Went home and had more. The more I stressed the harder and faster that they came. I finally passed out from one, one afternoon. I was home alone with my son. I was out maybe 10 seconds or so. Enough to freighten the pajesus out of me. I had a holter monitor strapped on me for 24 hrs. They were able to track them, however it still showed that they were a result of stress. I started to accept that, that was the cause of them and that I was not dying from some heart diesease. Once I made that mental note and believed it, the palutations have died down. Try and veiw them as a warning sign to look deeper into your self for what my be bothering you. I am sure it is the ovious "anxiety". If you still are unconfortable, go back to your dr. Let them know that you are having stress over this. Let them know that your not comfortable and need further assurrance. If stress is in fact causing them, then you deserve peace of mind. It is so IMPORTANT that we feel comfortable with the answers we are getting from our dr's.It is your right to feel safe and comfortable with your visit!!! A little FYI...When I see a "kaiser" dr. I always feel rushed. I have let my last dr know that I may be just another patient to you, but I AM somebody to me and my family!! She got the point! Take care.. Christine

Hi jaden:

I think as mothers we all have had that fear. I know I sure have and do at times. We are very afraid we won't be here to care for our children, It is natural as a mom to worry of that...BUT, the big thing is, you are wasting your precious time on worrying over something you may not have control over and in the end, missing out on your children's life. Because of worry. Palpitations are a normal occurance, I had them, I had the holter monitor and since then, if I have them, I don't let it bother me, they go away. Palpitations are more common in women b/c of our hormones. Also, not enough sleep, smoking, drinking all of those things affect it. Stress & Anxiety is the big cause. if you concentrate on them, they will appear to be more frequent and prevalent. You are okay, it is just anxiety, it will NOT hurt you. I have been there, I know how you feel. I have recovered and you can too.Have them put the holter monitor on you, it will put your mind at ease! Hang in there!
Kriten ~ okanxiety@aol.com

I have those fears at this moment of my life. Which i know what brought those feling on too. I was in 2 car crashes in 2 months. I feel like God is really trying to talk to me and tell me I need to be home with my children or i need to be looking to him for advice and lean on him when i fel scared. I feel like i'm going to die of some type of cancer or heart will give out on me or die in my sleep, But ihave gotten better than i was 2 weeks ago. Does anyway know for shure what the chances are of me diying of heart problems or cancer at my age of 22. I don't smoke or drinka nd eat healthy so i'm not shure but i've seen it happe. please help i'm scared.

I don't know if this will help, but I also have those fears. In fact, I obsessed so much over dying that I have spent alot of money this year trying to find ouy if something is really wrong with me. I already know that I have anxiety/panic/depression, but I was having severe tachacardia(sp?) at night. I would be sound asleep and wake up with a heart rate of 140bpm to 160bpm and it would last (on & off) for five minutes or so, then the rest of the night I would be freezing, and the next morning my chest would hurt so bad I could barely get out of bed. This has been going on for a year. I finally quit going to my general practitioner(sp?) and made my own appt. w/a cardiologist. He actually looked at my heart and said it was fine, but that I was really out of shape and very stressed out. Just knowing my heart is okay is a relief and has stopped some of the problems(chest pains). I have also had a mamogram and been seen by a gastrointerologist. I am only 34, and I am finally getting the point that stress is causing alot of my problems. I also know that if I don't stop stressing out over this, I really will get sick!!! My younger brother committed suicide two years ago and that's when I started obsessing about my health. I was so afraid I would die (not kill myself), but just not be here anymore. My mom left us when we were young and I just couldn't stand the thought of leaving my children with no one. Or no one I consider good enough anyway. This is one of the scariest fears I know of, but the anxiety/depression over it is causing more problems than any real or imagined health issue. This program, and the book (From Panic to Power) is helping me tremendously! I really have to work at stopping my scarey thoughts, eating right, exercising, and enjoying every precious present moment. It is a struggle right now, but getting a little easier every day. The fear and panic are so overwhelming sometimes it seems like I will drop dead at any second. But I have to keep telling myself I won't, and I even tell myself that way before that fear gets such a tight grip. I know God is giving me the grace to get through every day, one day at a time. I just don't want to let my thoughts on the future steal what's in the present. Hang in there, control what you can, and try to enjoy your time right this minute!!

i have big time .My kids are my whole life and i obsess about them dying and also have scary negative thoughts about them.I know its the anxiety and have been taught through CBT that you have to accept the thoughts know matter what the content.It boils down to lack of control and true acceptance and once the acceptance is truly attained and the contol is given up is when we can be ok ,but its very tough to get there and stay there

I'm an older mother.....I'm 50 years old with a little 8 year old daughter. I thought about that not long after she was born...most especially when I began seeing old classmates in the obituaries. But, in reality, I'm healthy and I look forward to each day that I do have with her. If God takes me home before she is grown.....he will have a plan for taking care of her too. I just relish each day and live it to the fullest. If I do die prematurely....there's nothing I can do about it and worrying about it only takes precious time that I could be busy making wonderful memories with her. There is just soooo much truth in "living for the moment". Hey....and really...that's all any of us have...we have "Now". She is a sweet and beautiful gift from God and I want all of our "nows" to be happy and productive mother/daughter memories...for her/or me. The rest is just faith. All future is "faith". But WE control the "now". Make your "now" a happy one.
I wish you peace and happiness with your beautiful son that God gave you to enjoy.

Thanks to you all for your posts.
RW3636, I really appreciate your reminder of how important "now" is.
Thank you

When I read this post all I could say is Whew! I am not the only one thinking that way! Jadenslight I am in the same boat as you in that I live with daily palpitations and the majority of my anxiety stems from it and the sensation is worse because of the constant thought of it. I've coped with the feelings by telling my husband my fear and asking him what would he do if I died prematurely and after our discussion and praying over it I felt a relief in that all my boys including my husband will be alright. I watch them when they are together and they are close and he is so wonderful with them I no longer fear for their well being. Part of my fear was stemmed from the fact that I am a control freak about certain things and that is a result of feeling powerless from the anxiety. This posting and replies were very helpful to me at this point in my life because I was starting to regress a little. RW3636 thank you for your encouraging words in this post as well, I have to remember to live in the moment not in fear and in the house because of it-it does zap away memory building times!

I would like to tell everyone who doesn't know that irregular heart beats can KILL you. I wne to the doctor and was told that if you can FEEL your heart like it's going to come out of your chest than you should get it checked out . Most of the time anyone under 30 is going to be ok. But i just have been praying to GOd and now i'm 100 percent better

I have a son and a daughter 18 months apart. I was divorced when they were small about 4 and 5. I was working full time and picking them up from the daycare then to home. I would have anxiety at work worrying who will take care of them if something happened to me. My family all lived closed by. You'd think I would not worry with all the family and friends I got. But that did not matter. Doctor put me on medicine and I even went to ER alot, got put in hospital twice. I was not satisfied with the results the doctors gave me. Oh you are fine, you have a lot of stress, anxiety. No, I know something is wrong with me! I want to know what it is so that I don't die! I have had every test you can think of from head to toe. Later on My aunt died of breast cancer and then my dad died of cancer. My oldest brother had a heart attack at age 45 but he is ok. I was sure that I was the next one to die of something. Look at me now, I am 40 years old. My son is a freshman in college and daughter is going to graduate from high school. I am just now getting off of some of my medication. But nothing happened to me. I and only I made myself sick. My thoughts took over my body. Work with the program and especially on Lesson 10 Stop those obsessive, scary thoughts. I wish I knew that then but I can not turn back the clock. The one thing that I did was I asked one of my brothers, I have three older brothers and I was born 9 years later, if I die will you take care of my children? He said sure. It helped put my mind at ease just knowing that a loved one or a close friend will take care of my children. I hope this will help you and any mothers out there. My heart goes out to you because I know what it was like.

Hi there i would like to tell you lemomlime that the only way to get help is through God. Adn GOd alone. I hae een praying for a month and every day is better and better. I would tell you to talk to God about it and let him take away all your worries and bad thougths

I totally agree with you mommybear. I do believe that praying is a powerful thing. I am reading a book named A Woman's Call to Prayer by Elizabeth George. Thank you for your comment .

LemonLime2,

I appreciate the quote at the bottome of your posts. It is precisely what I needed to read today
I put it on my refrigerator!

I would also like to add that I do get distracted by some things. But i just keep puting my trust in God. I was told and read in the bible that satan wants to tell us to doubt God and not to have faith that we ALL ARE GOING TO LIVE. When you get scared or have those thoughts or pains just pray to God to take those away. I want to be there for God like he has been there for me. Have faith in God that he is going to watch over you and let you know that everyything will be ok. i'm 21 and 10months old and i God my first panic attack at 21 and half old and started haveing anxiety. But i was told that i was too young to have all those problems. And i believe it is true. The only thing i have know is that i have troulbe with breating here and there but i was told that it could be allergies that i never new i had. But i will keep praying for those who are goin throug this and you all have to put your fears in God and god ALONE. love you all in christ