Hello, I was just wondering to all the parents our there how thier children handle OUR panic anxiety and depression, I know we all try to hide it from them but kids are pretty smart, my two are confused, its like "where did Mommy go" I try SO hard to maintain control, somedays the panic is so bad and the nausea and dizziness I have to lay down because the room is spinning, I feel alot of guilt. My main reason for getting the program is so I can get strong and healthy again for my children, I have been to the ER room, paramedics came once to the house and I have been to the Doctor, I cannot stand to effect my children, it got so bad I would run out of the room so they would not see it. What I was wondering was how your children handle it, any suggestions or advice on how to "keep it together" in front of them. Please send prayers I recover for my children if for no other reason on earth for them I want to get well and start living again, I have not left the house too much lately and fear I am becoming house-bound, I hope with this program and prayer I can become the Mother I once was. Thank you all for listening. God bless, Kucek.

hi there, I had to reply to you. My heart goes out to you completley. I know exactly how you feel as I went thru this with my kids. How old are your children? I educated my kids, then 8&6, now 9&7. I kept telling them that mommy was okay and she had anxiety, in fact, my son helped me more than anything. He is very intuitive and he made me see things that I couldn't see myself. You really have to just reassure them that you are okay and you are just going thru a tough time and it may take you some time to get back, but that you are NOT sIck! That is so important. I know we all want to do things for our children, but I have to tell you, in order to combat this anxiety, you Have to do it for you FIRST! You need to ask yourself..why am I so anxious, could it be my hormones, could it be my diet, try to figure out what makes you anxious. I know that you can get out of that house, I know that you can feel good again, you have to have a plan of attack. I suffered for many months, but I taught myself tools to conquer, I got motivated, committed to bettering myself and I did it. You can too. If you would like to talk, please email me at okanxiety@aol.com You are not alone in this and I really can feel your pain, but you don't have to live like this. http://www.itsonlyanxiety.com
Think positive and believe in yourself, these things will start bringing you back.
Kristen L. Baker, M.L.C.

Kucek,

My heart also goes out to you. I have an eleven year old son. I know how it is. I have only went twice to the ER, within a week time span. My son looked so normal, playing his gameboy like there was nothing going on, UNTIL the doctor came in. Then he came and stood at the head of my bed and listened intently. This was when he was 10 years old. So much maturity in a little boy his age. My son has dealt with this by asking questions. He also worries because his dad is not around much and I am all he has as far as a parent. I have told him honestly that I won't die from this and reassured him that it will be okay. He knows when I am having a "moment" sometimes..they don't happen as often now and I am handling them better than before and he doesn't always realize it is going on. This helps because it gets my mind off of it.
Unfortunately, he also suffers from anxiety at times. He has been listening to the tapes with me and it has helped him a lot! He sees what is going on and is learning how to deal with it in a more constructive way.
You don't say how old your children are, so that may be part of how they react to what is going on with you.
Cricket is right, you have to do it for yourself. Yes, I don't want my son to see what is going on, nor do I want him to experience any of it, BUT I know he will be stronger for it. He won't have to go through what I have the last 5 years.
This program will help. The fact that you want to get better is a move in the right direction. Instead of looking to be the person you once was, look towards being the person you will be, stronger and able to handle things in a new light. Take care.
Angela

I KNOW THAT IT AFFECTS THE KIDS AND IT REALLY IS AN OPPORTUNITY FOR US TO LOOK DEEP INTO OUR SELVES AND CONGER UP THE COURAGE AND FIGHT THIS WITH EVERY OUNCE OF STRENGTH WE HAVE BECAUSE THEY DONT SEE IT AS WE SEE IT, THEY WORRY AND I AM SURE THAT IT AFFECTS THEM BUT THEY EXPECT US TO BE STRONG FOR THEM CAUSE THAT IS WHAT PARENTS DO, SO PUT ALL YOU HAVE INTO SHOWING THEM EVEN THE TALLEST OF MOUNTAINS CAN STILL BE CLIMBED IT MAY TAKE A WHILE AND IT WILL BE HARD BUT IT IS ACHIEVEABLE SO LOOK AND THOSE LITTLE FACES AND THINK OR SAY I CANT ..... THAT OUGHT TO PUT SOME THINGS INTO PERSPECTIVE.

Hello, I was so happy and grateful to recieve your posts, you all sound like you totally understand and you all sound like such good loving parents. That is the worst thing about this anxiety/depression/health anxiety is that I feel I am robbing my two children 13 and 10 of their Mother, I actually sometimes feel like I am not even "functioning" on a normal MOther level, I love my children so very very much and you would think that would be the motivation to get well, I have fallen into a hole and I must climb out I have felt useless as a Mom, I see the confusion and hurt and fear in my sons eyes when I am sick and it tears my heart out! I actually went to my Doctor last week and cried "please help make me well" I usually do not do that, I am doing the program and trying so hard to concentrate, I am a very negative thinker and its so hard to think positive but I must try, I was just diagnosed with a bleeding ulcer and that has sent me back, my stomach churns 24/7 and the dizziness and nausea and even a little blood in my stool! I feel like I am a wreck, my prayer and my goal is to recover, if not all the way, somewhat so I can be the Mother I was and should be. Please send prayers, I have often heard God rarely refuses a Mothers prayer and they are very powerful! If you would pray for me I would be so grateful, as I will for you. Thank you all for your replies you are all angels, God bless, Kucek.