I have lived my life so long feeling the way that I feel, that I don't know what is supposed to be normal anymore. I see other people that seem to have everything together and I just know I want to have that. After listening to the program on TV, I know that I have to do something to get that. Just seems that looking back over my life that I have been this way for so long, with panic attacks, anxiety, depression, etc. I just thought that if i could get to the next day maybe it would be better. I have come so close to giving up. But I want to have a chance to experience a true good, rich, happy life. I always feel like I am running so hard, and all these problems and fears are chasing me, and I seem to be one step ahead...and I am afraid if I trip or stop for a half second that these things will just run me over....and it will be more than I can do to get up again. Just want to hide. But I don't want to be alone. I am so hoping that this program is going to help me..so I can get this weight off of me, so I can breath with relief...

You are not alone. I too have similar concerns and want to get to the point where I am not the scared person that tries to control everything to make my life comfortable. I have learned more so far with this program than I have ever received from a therapist or psychologist. This program is truly designed for people like us.
I truly believe that I was led to this program by God and that with the help of these lessons I will be able to finally be free.
There are a lot of us out here to help you and together we will get through this. You are not alone. Matt

I repeat the first line of the above post...YOU ARE NOT ALONE, now exhale. We are all on here because of anxiety and/or depression, we all have sought treatment, some for years and years. some are now on meds and looking for a way off, some are here to avoid meds. You have to find your own way, and this is a good place to start. You have nothing to lose...nothing, and everything to gain, including your life back! The journey will be long and tough, but wow what a reward. Do it, and don't look back! I hope you have a great Christmas and 2009 brings you a new life!

I really believe that you and all of us can/will have 'normal' lives again if we really want it and really work for it. Be sure to give yourself credit when you talk about the program helping you. You're doing the work, the program is the map to get you where you want to go. You deserve the credit for making this choice and commitment to change your life.

I just said those words yesterday. Will I ever be able to live my life without all the anxiety and stress or will I ever have a normal life. This Christmas was a terrible Christmas for me. First bad Christmas I can remember ever. I cried on Christmas...I've never cried on Christmas. It's sad how a family member can cut a would so deep without much effort. I need to fight for normalcy in my life if I'm going to get it. It's hard work. I am fortunate I have love and support of a great husband and a wonderful son. I think we all tend to focus on the negative and not the positive things in our life. I know I have that problem and that's part of the depression.

There SOOOOOOOOOOOO is life beyond anxiety disorder & depression. I, 1 of many, am proof positive of that. I am also 1 of many that RECOVERY IS DEFINITELY POSSIBLE - EVEN UNDER THE MOST "EXTREME" CIRCUMSTANCES OR CASES/DIAGNOSIS!

4 yrs ago, I was informed by 2 MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS, that I was 1 of the worst cases they had seen. 1 of them being my former psychiatrist(I recently graduated fr therapy after 4 yrs), who confirmed to me that I was 2 steps away fr being put in a PSYCH HOSPITAL - w/o any exageration. I was originally diagnosed w/ anxiety disorder + panic attacks + ptsd: fr 3 diff things + severe sleep deprivation: was only averaging 1-2 hrs of sleep, per every 24 hrs. Add to that overwhelming mix, my having to address "experiences" + "gut wrenching emotional pains" fr my past/childhood - that most don't ever experience - or even experience in an entire lifetime. Finally, I was very over-weight: I probably weighed @ that point apprx 225+lbs - I'm only 5'3 1/2. I never had any physical symptoms prior to my anxiety disorder triggering. I went FROM:being an independant woman: on her own in h.s. & graduated + worked f.t. - had her own apt + attended college @ nite & graduated on the honour society B/4 GETTING MARRIED in 1997, TO:the most emotionally unstable person you'd ever met: totally dependant on my husband(was never ever a "needy/clingy" type of woman) + emotionally dependant on anyone willing to give me the time of day + could no longer work - emotionally & physically, I just wasn't capable. It was a drastic & extreme change - like the rug was swept fr underneath me. Everyone I knew worked. So, fr the moment my anxiety disorder was triggered (APRIL 2005) - to the time when I did recover & returned to working AMERICA in MARCH 2008 - I WAS HOME ALONE - majority of the time, for several yrs.To say I was LONELY would be an understatement. It couldn't have gotten much worse than it was for me.

I had to FIGHT for my recovery & I did every single step of the way. In my particular case, that involved my attending weekly & very intensive therapy sessions every single week, never missing 1 session. This was a necessity for me long b/4 I was even ready for Lucinda's program. SIMULTANEOUSLY, I set out(eventually) to "empower" myself. I initiated "journaling": I desperately needed to get myself to a place where I was COMFORTABLE admitting what I was thinking & feeling - then - FEEL THE EMOTIONS = LET THEM OUT. I journaled a little something every day. Heck, I so didn't know HOW TO JOURNAL - I distinctly remember, my 1st line in my 1st journal, "what am I supposed to say here", lol - 100% true. I wound up journaling 8 5-SUBJECT NOTEBOOKS full.Now, I know that sounds like a lot & it is. I was 37 yrs old when anxiety disorder triggered. That equated to 30+ yrs of my SURPRESSING my fears + worries + deep seeded & traumatized emotional pains + resentment/anger. The pen I held in my hand & that piece of paper in that notebook were BOTH MY TOOLS of allowing me to finally get it out.
- After I initiated journaling, I set out to become "informed & empowered" - by researching. I read like 16 books on anxiety disorder & depression. I was literally BEYOND CLUELESS as to what anxiety disorder was. I wanted to know/understand/findout. I would read + write notes - like I was in school again. If I had a question, I'd either ask my psychiatrist or my regular dr - I'd research the "concept/theory" on line & make notes - ANYTHING that did ensure I "got it" = I understood. Knowledge is power. Little by little, graually I was accumulating KNOWLEDGE. It wasn't enough that my psychiatrist "TOLD ME SO" - I, Lenore had to not only "find out for herself" - she had to "understand/grasp" it for herself. For once I did, CHANGE started - I was able to apply these things into my life/actions/behaviors/thoughts - so I was gradually feeling better. Instead of "fearing the many fears" I had - little by little, I was able to CONFRONT THEM/FACE THEM DWN & FEEL THE PAINS NECESSARY for change to happen.

I found this site & Lucinda's program early early on. I read the forums every day - it let me know I wasn't alone like ANXIETY DISORDER tried to TRICK ME INTO BELIEVING. HOwever, I wasn't ready for it yet in the beginning. THERAPY afforded me the opportunity to un-burden myself w/ yrssssss of surpressed & very negative emotions. I termed it "my bag of rice". It was like my carrying around a 10lb bag of rice on my shoulders my entire life - never realizing I was not only doing it - but also how very much it was hurting me/wearing me out & dwn. I didn't know there was A WAY OUT - A BETTER WAY. THERAPY for me, initially, showed me how. It was my having done just that(the THERAPY), that I was finally able to take personal accountability & responsibility. It was honestly & literally like I was looking in the mirror for the 1st time & I COULD SEE WHAT I WAS STARING @ - if I make any sense this early in the morning, lol lol You know that song, "I could see clearly now the rain is gone, I can see all obstacles in my way"? Well, that was me - in that after I LET GO of all those emotions, I could FINALLY see me & I recognized there were parts of me & MY PERSONALITY & MY WAY OF DOING THINGS that just needed changing if I wanted to FEEL BETTER. It was @ that PRECISE moment that I was ready for LUCINDA'S PROGRAM. It was @ that moment, I was ready to change - w/o blame or pointing the finger @ anyone, including myself.

I purchased Lucinda's program & started it the 1st time back in NOV 2006. I hit the ground running w/ her program. For the 1st time in my life - I was making me & my recovery my #1 priority. If I truly wanted to feel better (which I did) I had to. In my mind, I was in COLLEGE (the college's were both "THERAPY" & "LUCINDA'S PROGRAM") & my major was EMOTIONAL WELLNESS/RECOVERY - nothing more & nothing less. So, I was LEARNING a healthier way of life = thinking/acting/reacting/living, etc. You know something, dr's + mechanics + pharmacists + nurses + accountants, etc - don't just wake up & become those things, no. They had to LEARN HOW.I was no different. So, that is the mindset I went in w/ when I did Lucinda's program. That is the attitude I had - I was learning, quite simply. I FOLLOWED THE PROGRAM INSTRUCTIONS "STRICTLY" AS INSTRUCTED. If there were concepts/theories I was grappling w/(& there were a few) - I didn't just give up - I RESEARCHED THEM: w/ another book + asking questions on line/forum + w/ my psychiatrist - I TOOK/MADE NOTES - again, ensuring I was "getting it/understanding" the particular theory she was trying to get through my really thick head, hahahahah ! My priority everyday, 1 day @ a time when doing LUCINDA'S PROGRAM, was doing the program. Straight out, PROGRAM 1st - everyday. See, I know it isn't easy & I admit it - it isn't. HOwever, what choice did I really have? Honestly? It was I FEELING THESE THINGS - not my husband + our family + friends + dr's + therapists + online forum/chat friends, none of them. IT WAS ME - so, if I wanted to TRULY FEEL BETTER - then it was I WHO HAD TO FIND A WAY TO "MAKE IT HAPPEN/FIND THE TIME" & WORK IT LIKE NOBODY'S BUSINESS.

I recovered fr anxiety disorder/panic attacks/ptsd. However, after my having done so - in MARCH - 2007, I was officially diagnosed w/ major depression. LOL, I remember telling my therapist "what is this some sick joke?" lol - honest statement. I had come so far - there was no time to "wallow" or "dwell" or have 1 massive "pity party" - I had worked too darn hard. So, I worked some more & harder. I continue my therapy + required meds + made some more changes in my life. 1 of them being, I joined WEIGHT WATCHERS in JUNE 2007 = 2-3 mths after being diagnosed w/ depression. My weight wasn't the only reason behind my depression - it was a factor & I was CHIPPING AWAY @ the why's behind MY PERSONAL DEPRESSION.

Remember, I was home & not working. I had ample opportunity to sit & do nothing. Every single day, the bed & couch cld my name. Depressions whispers to me were quite loud w/ "lay around" or "eat that you'll feel better" - I didn't listen. I fought hard & I prayed every day. Gradually, depression was losing its grip w/ me. My med's were gradually lowered & the frequency of my sessions were more spaced apart(every month) & I started to lose weight & I FELT BETTER - honest. FAST FORWARD:I am recovered fr depression + I am off all meds - particularly depress meds + I did graduate therapy 2+ mths ago after my attending for almost 4 yrs + I did successfully complete Lucinda's program 2X'S + I have lost weight = I am now size 4-6 - originally I started W.W.'S @ size 22-almost size 24 = lot of weight for a gal only 5'3 1/2 + I am working successfully + I know how to CHILL OUT - PLOP A SQUAT & VEG MAN + I am, most important @ peace overall & FINALLY my greatest desire when starting this journey I AM OK W/ MYSELF, BY MYSELF - IN MY OWN COMPANY. I love me.

Now, was all that a lot of work - yes, the hardest thing I ever did & then some. However, I have me + my emotional independance/wellness - my life living as I choose NOT dictated by anxiety disorder or depression. I had to WANT IT & FIND A "WAY" TO MAKE IT HAPPEN, opposed to wallowing in the excuses I did create in the beginning. I am no super-hero. I was/am simply a lady/gal who wanted to FEEL BETTER.

There is a way to recovery. Follow her program STRICTLY as instructed - make YOU & YOUR RECOVERY a priority in your life. EMPOWER yourself w/ the information that is out there on anxiety disorder & depression.

LENORE

GOOD FOR YOU. HURRAH! YOU DID IT AND I AM PROUD OF YOU FOR HAVING THE COURAGE. MY SISTER IS A WW LEADER IN FLORIDA.

Hi I am new to the program and hopefully will find some hope for this condition. I live every monment under fear worrying if I am going to have an attack. And when its hits I look to run somewhere and just cry.I feel overwelmed and scared. It passes eventually but this has been going on for years on an off. It like being in hell all the time. I wish I could have just one day feeling good. Please tell me there is hope!
Will this ever end. Somedays I wake up and tell myself this is going to be a good day and then somwhere along the line it hits like an earthquake. I am trying everything possible. Drs. medication and now I will start this program as soon as it is delivered to me anyday.

I love Lenore's post. To see what you have accomplished is motivating enough!

I think the key point here is that this program and our issues need to be taken seriously and made priority in our lives.

You have to want it. There is nothing more important than a piece of mind.