I'm on lesson 5 and I know the topic of guilt is covered in a future lesson but I would like some advice now.

How do I get over the guilt I feel about not being able to go out to dinner with family/friends? I have conquered some of my fear of driving and going out but I'm still not comfortable driving very far or going out to dinner in public.

My Mother has been having some problems with her ankle and went to see a Podiatrist a few days ago. Tomorrow she is having an MRI done of her ankle since the Podiatrist said he didn't like the looks of the cartilage in her ankle. She wants me to go with her but I am so damn scared of driving the 10 miles to the imaging place. I would do better I think if I could drive myself and meet her there. I just feel so stupid and heartless that I can't do this one thing that my Mom is asking of me.

I have good days and bad and today seems to be a bad day. I'm on Zoloft and take Xanax when I need it (which isn't very often). I am so tired of living like this.

Does anyone have any suggestions?

Hi Amy,
Do you have the program and, if so, have you started it, yet? It deals a lot with this type of situation.

Does your mom know about your anxiety disorder? Can you talk to her and see if you can arrange another ride for her?

Could you go ahead and drive her anyway - feeling anxious and scared? You really can, you know. Bring xanax with you (and water) just in case you need it. Remind yourself that it's only for this appointment and then you'll be able to bring your mom home and go home yourself. Instead of being upset with yourself for feeling this way, talk soothing to yourself. Your inner child needs your love and support - not your judgement and anger. She's doing the best she can. Let her know that. Also, tell your inner child that it's OK to feel scared and anxious and that if she wants to have an anxiety attack she can have one when the appt is all over and you are back home again. Give her permission, Amy. She probably won't have the attack that you are projecting.

My best to you.

amy,
well bless your heart...as you go through the program.. it will get easier for you...i went through the program in 2004. i drove and listened to the relaxitation tape.. and had the cards with me...i drove over 4 hours,and yes i was scared. but nothing happened...i met my wife through that time...i know that its hard for you right now. as for going out to eat...it sounded like i used to be.if you go. sit where you can get up if you have to...order small meals...get it to go if you can't stay...i ordered take 0ut and wnet and picked it up.. does your mother understand what you are going through...if so she will understand...you will not die and you will not pass out. even though you feel like it...put your mind on other things..think happy thoughts. even though it might be hard to do..i have just now been able the past few months to get over the panic and anxiety...and i am so thankful to GOD for that...it will happen to you.. give it a chance to work.. and step out and do it...i know you can.. how because i have faith in you..have faith in yourself, and the program as well..take care and our thoughts and prayers are with you...GOD BLESS...let me know how things went. i bet you will surprise yourself...
don

Thanks to all for replying to my post. I'm sorry that it's taken me so long to write back my thanks but life gets in the way sometimes. I ended up not going at all with my Mom to have her MRI....my IBS decided to act up really bad that day and was running to the bathroom every 5 minutes. I felt so bad not being able to go with her. Yes, she knows about my anxiety disorder and is understanding....I'm just so hard on myself (aren't we all here?).

Thanks again for your support.

Amy