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Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
Take heart those with scary thoughts of hurting others|
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I was talking with my close friend who suffered with obsessive scary thoughts. The very first and worst one was in October, 2001, when he awoke to a thought/dream that he hurt his beloved wife. He used to be fearful of being close to her when a knife, scissors, nail file or any sharp object was nearby. In late 2002 he was lucky enough to sign up for a free OCD outpaitent program. He waited several months til a slot opened up, eventually doing exposure treatment. Note: Exposure treatment is considered the gold standard in treating obsessive, pure-o OCD but it is very, very rough and should be done only if the patient is ready and is working with an OCD specialist only. He was considered one of the facility's top patients, as he overcame the OCD.
He and his wife just passed their six-year anniversary and now he loves her more than ever; their relationship keeps getting better as time goes on. Now when he sees a knife and is near his wife, the thought is not a scary one, but one of briefly remembering a bad situation that was overcome. In fact, when he remembers his old fear, it also like remembering a minor past nuisance. You won't hurt your relative/friend/someone else. Pure O is pure mental garbage. You can overcome this! |
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thank you for the encouragement. You're a good man, Charlie Brown.
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I tell you what's funny....Is that I felt like that for a while and it just seemed to just kind of fade away. Just like I thought I would say something out loud @ the most in oportune times....that went away....Reading all these posts is definitely making me see that all of this crap will definitely fade away, and life will be as it used to........
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Thanks Sarah Anne.
May your recovery be a rapid one, bernard123. |
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I use to have the same OCD thoughts about hurting loved ones when I would look at a knife or something sharp. I found that those who feel the most, who are very caring and loving to others, especially a spouse or children are the ones who are most vulnerable to OCD and frightening thoughts.
These thoughts can be so repulsive! It seems that we are exposed to a lot of news reports or stories that make us cringe when we are very anxious or depressed. If we were calm and not anxious, we would turn off the TV and walk away not thinking of them anymore. We would have many interests and activities in our lives to keep them from bothering us. Our lives would be content with everyday living, free from fear. I have found that on occasion, I will have thoughts like I did before, but they no longer frighten me. I may be aware that I am feeling anxious at the time about something and the thoughts are anxious garbage that needs to be taken out. The frightening thoughts are pure garbage! They will only bother you when you do not accept them as garbage and go on with your life. Fear cannot live in a calm mind and body. God bless you. |
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I can honestly say, my obsessive scary thoughts did fade away. I grew up having scary thoughts and not knowing why. Then when my dad got the program when I was around 19 years of age and I finally knew that they these thoughts were caused by the anxiety, they went away. On the rare occurence that I do have an obsessive scary thought, like hurting loved ones or jumping off a balcony, it has no power. It's just a thought, it's strange how much things change.
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I used to have these scary thoughts. Now your right, they are just a passing memory. I haven't told anyone about them ever!! This forum is awesome!
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Angel's hope, P&P, Caren, thanks for the replies.
Angel's hope, you wrote "I found that those who feel the most, who are very caring and loving to others, especially a spouse or children are the ones who are most vulnerable to OCD and frightening thoughts." You are right. My friend proposed to his wife when they were going out 10 months, and almost cried when he saw her enter the church on their wedding day. And then he gets a weird and horrifying dream and then starts to worry he's that guy Peterson who killed his wife P&P, I am sorry you had to grow up with those thoughts. My friend is the same way as you: he still might get one every once in a while but he treats it like everyone else---because everyone gets weird thoughts. He just ignores it and doesn't let it get to him because he knows the real deal about pure-O. You're right: how strange how much things change. Caren, I am glad you no longer have those thoughts. It's ok you've never told them to any one. Most non-OCD people get these thoughts but don't make a big deal about them; they just go on with their life. There's an old saying that goes something like "Unless you're in my shoes, you do not know my walk." Unless someone has an OCD thought (or some other mental/physical ailment), you really don't know what it is about. People on this forum know what scary obsessive thoughts are like. |
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Thank God there are people like you Charlie. I really needed to hear this, as hurting others or even just speaking about it, is my fear that keeps me down.....and I mean down.
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I've read a lot about people fearing knives, etc when loved ones are around, fearing they might hurt them, and I share that fear. But I was wondering if anyone gets to the point where they dread visiting relatives or just the thought of the person because it brings up those scary thoughts?
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Mr. Positive,
Wow! I am humbled. Thank you. I am sorry you are going through this. I offer this link to help put your mind (and any one else's mind) at ease. http://www.ocdonline.com/articlephillipson1.php You feeling down is a natural and totally understandable response, and--believe it or not--a good thing. Why? Because it shows you regret and hate these thoughts which shows this is pure-O. My friend often went through mild depression after a scary thought. I also offer this link, http://www.ocfoundation.org/. This group is a great resources for OCD help. If you're going to see a therapist, make sure it is one is well-trained with pure-O. A "regular" therapist can actually be counter-productive. My friend's 2nd worst scary thought was self-harming. He had no desire to commit the "s" word; it was just a scary thought. When he told his first therapist, he wanted my friend to sign a pact that he would not commit the "s" word. It freaked out my friend. Garrettwriter, Likewise, my heart goes out to you that you suffer this horrid form of anxiety. Excellent question. It is entirely possible. For my friend, the persons who were the main thoughts were the people physically and geographically closest to him: his wife and himself so I can't say if this possibility existed for him. When he saw or thought of his wife, his reaction was more like "I don't want to have a scary thought" as opposed to, say, him on the bus going home from work and an image of his wife brought on the thought. |
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I just wanted to re-iterate the importance of the site Charlie Brown referenced. http://www.ocdonline.com
I have referenced this site many times and it was the over-riding factor in my overcoming this disorder. Also, highly recommend are: "Brain Lock" "Imp Of Mind" "The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook" Forums and Chats _________________________________________ "When you fear that you cannot, let that fear motivate you to prove that you can!" |
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I argee with the above posts, I ahve suffered through this particular form of ocd for about four years now and the turn around for me was putting the articles on the above web sites to practice!!!!!!!! It put the power back in me and the power to be my own guide through ocd problems. Its still work but im much more confident in recognizing it when it comes up now.
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I know my friend read "Brain Lock" and "Imp of the Mind". He had mentioned both books are excellent for pure-O. "Brain Lock" also deals with compulsions but the section on the obsessions is very helpful. "Imp" is entirely about the scary thoughts and it is outstanding.
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RG07053000027 |
I have thoughts about hurting my children i am scared of these thoughts they wont go away and i dwell on them all the time. Im scared and frustrated cause i know im in love my kids please help with these thoughts if any one can help me please email me momluvjvs@AOL.COM PLEASE I KNOW IM NOT THE ONLY ONE
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Stress Center Community
Forums
Everyone Welcome
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
Take heart those with scary thoughts of hurting others
