The program is working. Things don't upset me like they did just a month ago. I however,find myself crying and sleeping a lot. And then when the night comes, I can't sleep. I have noticed that I am starting to drink before bedtime some times so that I do fall asleep. Not every night but I have noticed that I do that from time to time. I just get so sad and lonely. I feel alone. I am getting my work done. I am exercising, eating well, but getting out of bed in the morning takes some doing. I feel very negative toward me and even with the positive self-talk, I still have bouts of feeling like my life is a disappointment to God. I know it is not, but I feel so isolated. It took me two weeks to get through session 4, Expectations,because I really did have high expectations of myself and the world. I am reframing them and that makes a huge difference. I just feel so alone and nothing I am doing, with the exception of prayer, is helping. I live alone. I am not married and I do not have children. I am considered successful. I animal fur makes me sneeze. I am thinking about taking up knitting or something. My mom and my best friends live out of state but are very supportive of my and the program. If anyone has any advice, encouragement, or can relate, please respond. Thank you for listening.

Hi! I can really relate to your situation. I made the mistake of taking some time off before I start my new job and I am driving myself crazy! I thought it would be nice to be alone and work on the program, but its getting very lonely. The anxiety is easier to control, but the lonliness is really hard to combat.
I found that I need to keep busy and talk to people whenever I have the chance. I think that knitting is a great idea! I found that sewing really helps me when I start feeling alone. You just need something to keep your mind engaged so the negative thoughts have no room to creep in. I know it sounds simple, but it really works. And you will feel a sense of accomplishment when you finnish a project. So go pick out some yarn! It will do you good! Yoga is a great tool as well, especially for relaxation before bed. Good luck and dont worry it will pass just as the anxiety subsided from working on the program.

Hi Amethystt,
You're probably not sleeping at night because you're sleeping during the day. Claire Weekes talks about this and things you can do to help keep you out of your bed during the day. Any of her books or tapes would be good (Amazon has them). I too think knitting would be a great idea! I crochet and I must say, it has helped me a great deal in the depression area. It's so important to get that feeling of accomplishment, doesn't matter where it comes from. Mine is crochet, or it could be gardening, art work, any craft, etc. It keeps the mind busy. I probably don't have to say that alcohol is not a good thing to use to get to sleep. I'm sure you know it. Even though you're allergic to animal fur there are some pets you could have. What about a goldfish? Taking care of someone/something else can help. I don't know what it is about sleeping lately because I've seen a couple of posts on the boards about the lack of it and I'm also not sleeping well these past few nights. I've been falling asleep about an hour later than usual and waking up just 3 hours later (the @#%&!!! alarm clock my husband sets for 3 am could be doing it!) and then I can't fall back asleep for hours. I'm sure this rough period will pass for me. I swear I'm gonna throw the husband in the spare room! Then he can set the stupid alarm for any ol' time he wants.

Hi Amethystt,
How about volunteering or taking some kind of adult education class? I think it is really important for you to get out among others, combat some of that loneliness. Also, I am allergic to animal fur as well, but seem to do ok around my friend's golden doodle (he is an adorable golden retriever/poodle mix. Very well behaved and very lovable. They are supposed to be hypo-allergenic). Good luck. I have been where you are and it is very hard but you need to find things to occupy your time...Good luck!!

Hey Amethystt,
I can defianately relate. I also live alone, am not married and I do not have children. Sleeping is a problem for me too! But like "Craw" says "You're probably not sleeping at night because you're sleeping during the day". You have to do anything you can do to help keep yourself out of your bed during the day. That would include any of the suggestions that have been posted on the boards here. Remember, most of these people have had the same feelings and same habits that lead to the "depression" mery-go-round. Don't feel bad, you be surpised at my sleeping schedule. Let's just say it needs drastic improvement. I am working on it and I am committed to making this program work. I have tried everything else in the world and this seems to be my last hope.
Find stuff to do. Keep with the program and follow it to the T. It does not matter what it is you do, as long as it is positive and you get a feeling of acomplishment after havinging done it. This is what seems to work for me, and let me tell ya, I've been wrestling with depression for quite some time now and I have learned that if I keep myself occupied (doesn't matter what it is), I stay out of those doldrums. Also, keep in close contact with your family members, they will support you, love you and stay behind you working through this program. We can win the battle, and it is not as bad as our negative minds make it out to be! I'm on your side.....

Hello Everyone,

Wow! Thank you. I did not expect so many and such positive responses. Thank you all very much for your generosity and grace. I am doing yoga, it does work and I think I will try the knitting thing because it is immediate and I know a friend who already does it. Thank you.

I can also relate to this. I'm divorced with no children and now am living alone. Well, not entirely- my cat Ms Kitty is with me. It's a whole different way of life but it doesn't mean you can't be happy. I started painting just so I could put some color on the walls and now have paintings hanging everywhere. I may have never started doing this if I had remained married- so a new hobby was born! Are you allergic to birds? They can make great pets and companions. I love them but so does my cat so that's out for me. I get sad and lonely sometimes too but my married life really wasn't that great.

I found a great computer program called Petz when I moved after my divorce started (no pets in the apartment). It's not perfect, but it's better than I expected. Good luck and remember that you have friends here.

Bear