Most of my life I have been depressed. I had a horrible childhood, and as a teen I knew if I could change my thought process I would feel and do better but instead of changing my thought process I would spend money, take trips to different places and not tell anyone where I was going, and be with strangers. As the years went by my thought process about myself kept getting worse. I look in the mirror now and see someone who I really dislike. The mistakes I have made in my life I can't forget nor forgive myself. That seems to be my main problem.