Do you feel guilty posting problems on the forum? Especially if you use your real name or are talking about a family member or friend. Or talking about something causing anxiety that is very personal?

Do you feel a measure of guilt if you open yourself up as if you are a complainer?

I'm just asking because sometimes I'm concerned about some of that.

Victoria
I know what you are talking about. After many years of being trained to be "seen and not heard" I am trying to understand the difference between being heard and being a complainer. It has been a journey of trial and error. Sometimes I have felt that it is good for me to expose my thoughts and feelings and work backwards to reassure myself that I do have a right to speak up - although I am learning that there are some things I chose not to expose - not because I would be concerned about what others thought about me - but because people can be so insensitive sometimes and I like myself too much to put me thru that. Some people do not deserve the privelege of my "complaints".
Imagine if Lucinda decided not to expose her fears, anxieties, and scary thoughts. A part of her would still be saying "HEY! YOU! YOU GOT SOMETHING TO SHARE WITH THE WORLD!!!!" And I for one, would not be where I am today.
Perhaps sharing our complaints help us connect to others. Perhaps someone else is feeling guilty about opening up and sharing a traumatic experience.

Hi Bakedpears,
I feel exactly as you wrote. I want to thank you for your valuable insight.

There would of been a time that I never would of thought I would share what I have on the internet. But I have found that this web site, the MW center, is the best place because its like going to a group therapy. Most of us were/are in one way or another in the other person's shoes.

And we are most fortunate that Lucinda opened up as she has or we probably would not be having this forum, work books, etc.

And then we are blessed to have you having gone through your own learning trials and therefore can understandingly be there for others.

Thanks for the reply. It helps take the edge off the "guilt" of sharing.

Victoria

I feel extremely guilty talking about my problems especially since 9/11 and what is happening in Israel. Most of our problems on this board are problems the less fourtunate wished they had. A lot of people out there has rough lives and real severe problems. For instance people living in Israel. There are so many killings in that country. These people have no idea where the next bomber will strike. Enjoy what you have and stop worrying what you can't control.

Thank you Glue Stick
for your insightful reply. I've been thinking on similar lines. For me, when something that I might consider tragic or awful happens I feel upset and under certain circumstances angry. That's often because my first reaction is from a human stand point. I then want tell a close confidential friend who kindly listens and could earn $100 for the time I take if they had a license. LOL. Then, I feel guilty unloading because that friend, whom I chose to talk because I knew they would understand, had similar if not worse problems.

You brought up a good point. There was in deed terrible suffering from the 9/11 tragedy just a year ago. And the conditions in Isreal are truly sad. I'm finding that by throwing our burdens on God knowing he understandingly will in his due time eliminate suffering to be most comforting to me. And when I tell a friend of my own suffering my friend will remind of that.

Wishing you well,
Victoria

Do you think less people will seek help now because they feel guilty expecially after 9/11. There are so many psychologists and social workers out there that tell everybody to seek help. I think they are doing this to make a living. Everybody will think they have problems and will folk over money to the professional. The professional will tell you the same stuff you already know. Maybe if there wasn't a 9/11 or bombings in israel maybe I wouln't feel so guilty.