Greetings folks and I hope all is well for all of you. I apologize for not logging on sooner. I just listened to session 3 tonight.

Here's my story. All of us have those certain calendar dates that are burned in our memory. Mine is August 3rd. I am 30, married with a child, and have spent the better part of 16 years in front of people. Speaking, singing, radio, announcing, you name it. Several months ago I was preparing to speak and got a bit antsy. At first it was the temperature in the room, then it was my shirt, then it was something I ate. I jumped up, excused myself from the room and found myself being sick. Sure a person gets antsy when speaking but this was the first time. For the next several months the process repeated and I learned a new behavior. I always got through the speaking engagement and nobody had a clue what was going on behind the scenes. In fact, a lot of people said the presentations got better. On August 3rd I was preparing and was sick again. I made it through teh presentation, went to a quiet, dark place and told my wife I was finished. I love doing what I do but could not go through the constant sickness before speaking. I went ahead and got medical clearance and my wife told me to order this information.

I've always had some issues with nerves, even in early childhood. My folks told me that when we would go do something fun and exciting it wasn't unusual for them to pull over so I could be sick. Now here we are. It's amazing how life can play out. All of a sudden the things that I could always do at the drop of a hat are not so easy. Now my calendar list of to do events is just one apprehension to the next.

Since starting the lessons I have had some good moments even with the occasional setback. Over the past week I was even able to get through 3 speaking engagements without having to find a restroom. I try to be hopeful and tell myself this is temporary. I love what I do and want to continue doing what I love. I certainly will not allow myself to withdraw from doing what I want, even if there's some tension.

That's my story. I hope we all find the peace we are looking for.

Hi LostVoice

I'm new here but wow can I realte to your going from once doing things "normally" and being active to now feeling dread and aprehension at the thought of them.

When I start going down that thought path I try to remind myself to instead of thinking over and over about my fears if I leave the house and all the things that could go wrong, I try to think about all the things that I will get acomplished and the things that will go right. It goes right along with week 3's message too in self talk.

Keep up the good work!

Thanks for the feedback. Little victories along the way are making things better. I am still yet to preach but I have been able to get through other things that were difficult when this blew up. I'm changing my way of thinking and trying to get things back the way they once were. Part of my problem has been turning off the dread about all of the events of the future. Unfortunately I did a bad job of managing my emotions in the past. Hopefully this will bring about inner peace and a new enjoyment of life.