hey, i just started the program right when sept. ended (early Oct)... I'm currently on session 1, week 1..

Feeling alot of fear and sadness as my initial emotions listening to the tape and beginning the program...

I also have shame for experiencing this stuff as a guy - this is something I've experienced all my life - any men out there who can relate ???

all the best to all of us!

Hey longislandguy,

You are SO not alone! I have struggled with this for almost 30 years, and I'm only 36! Anxiety and depression do not discriminate - based on sex or any other attribute. I know what you mean though - I also was ashamed for having such a condition as a man. Men are supposed to be strong and confident. Unfortunately, life's just not that straightforward. EVERYONE experiences anxiety (stress), but some people have the COPING skills to deal with it better than others do. You CAN learn these skills, and this program will teach you them.

Enjoy the program!

John

Longislandguy,
I'm really sorry for your suffering. But I wanted to tell you this..... It has been my experience that those who suffer with anxiety and depression are the strongest people alive.
So you are one of those people. I know it's hard to feel that way now, but it is so very true. I know too you don't feel this way now, but maybe one day you will actually count this as a blessing. It's so hard to understand why some of us have to go thru hard times, but it shapes us into the people we are. Those that I know that have suffered with this condition, are the most kind, caring, compassionate people.
Having this condition has helped me to be a more compassionate person , not that I wasn't compassionate before, but I am even more now. Also now I am able to help others that have suffered with this condition and are suffering. I want to encourage you to stick with this program. I was in a terrible shape, could barely leave my home, and really wasn't functioning at all. I felt like I was in a living hell, and could not see any light at the end of this dark tunnel. This program has been the answer for me, but it is not easy, and it is not an overnight fix. But I assure you, it does work, and if you will make it a priority, you will be amazed at the change you will see in yourself and your life. I wish you the very best, and if you ever need a friend to talk to, please feel free to send me a private message. I will be glad to respond. Also, go to the chat rooms there are lots of wonderful people there to help and encourage you. When you don't think you can go on, they will be there to help.
Your New Friend
Angla

hi,
it does not matter if we as men have the same thing tha women have.it will get better as you go through the program.when i used to have panic and anxiety and all the rest of the stuff.i can relate to what you are saying .please read my profile so i will not fill the whole screen. lol. but you can beat thin as you go through the program and follow what it tells you to do.step out of your comfort zone.i used to have it and it lasted for 40 or 50 years.but now its gone.
i thank God for bring me through it along with the program. take care and be blessed.
don
We can't do it but He can

Hey longislandguy,

Ok I'm not a man but do not view this problem as a weakness in anyone. The fact you even came on this forum and posted shows how strong you are. A weak man would not have had the courage to take this step. This is a serious medical problem and affects both sexes. It's so true what Crave said and I believe a real man is able to feel emotion and should feel that it is okay to do so. We are all human beings and it's only certain outdated rules that dictate how a person should feel, who should be able to hurt, who can feel sad, shed a tear, who we should love, and so on. Well give me a guy anyday who has the passion it takes to cry over someone who in his mind is so much a "mans man" he can't feel anything but anger and rage towards himself, women and all beings, has no feelings or soul. I have known a few of these men and believe me the last one we knew was the last one we will ever associate with. So please never feel less of a man because of anxiety and depression. Be Kind To Yourself. You are strong and couragous and will along with all of us beat this.

So Welcome Aboard,
You are amoung friends.
GOOD LUCK!!!!

longislandguy,

Welcome aboard ! You're not alone. I thought I was until I joined recently. Now I know that I'm not. Just because we're men doesn't mean that we're made of stone. I think that there are so many men that could benefit from this program but, you know, we're way too macho to ask for help (kind of like asking for directions while driving.....). Just by typing and getting responses made a world of difference for me. I still have panic attacks, but at least I know I'm not alone anymore. Just don't stop the program like I did. I bought the program in 1999 ! I just wiped the dust off of it and started it yesterday.

Post anytime you feel the need to.

hi longisislandguy
welcome and the very best to you in trying to defeat ( at very least control this) and becoming the better human being(the best) you can!
I spent 12 yrs in marines and feel NO shame in trying to better myself. Doesn't matter to me where it comes froms....
I am in so much hopes of treating myself better and those around me because of this program.
Behind every great man is a great woman... and if we (as men) really look at just how strong woman are.... a big part of that would include how they try (no matter how hard) everything they can to overcome (with help of places just like this)whatever it is they are going through. Now i don't know about you... but maybe just maybe they are on to something... and without any shame. FIXING ones self.. to the point where you are comfortable in your own skin is nothing to be ashamed about!
good luck god sped and if u ever need anything.. ask.. i might NOT be able to help but i promise you someone in here will be able to. again the best to you

Hello longislandguy and wery welcome here!!
I'm a lady with difficult anxiety and depression for almost my whole life and I'm now 47 years old. I too had felt a lot of shame about this condition and I told myself over and over again why can't you justgetting better and be a strong person and that doesn't help me. But this programme and the help from friends here at the site make me feel a lot better and That's great though I just started the programme. I listen to the relaxtion cd as often as I can. I think there is different ways to be strong.

I'm a 32 super jock and that was the way I used to think Why do I have this etc I can tell you I just started week 9 and I promise you stick with it all of sudden its like the movie the Matrix you start seeing it for what it is and once you do You will make it hang in there be kind to yourself and above all BE PATIENT the support forums are awesome we are all in this together

amen lionsfan (LETS GO BUFFALO!!), we ARE all in this together.

i have felt the same thing at times. shame that because I am suffering with panic disorder that I am somehow inadequate; weak.

but as you go through this, you begin to understand that this is a completely normal, HUMAN reaction. and you are human, aren't you?

so don't sweat the societal role garbage.

'we're "here", so now how do we get out of "here"' is where our thoughts and energies should be.

hey- another way of looking at it- don't we, as men, always hear about how women want their men to be more caring? well now it is time for the ladies to step up to the plate. the ladies should love a more available man, no?

quote:

hey- another way of looking at it- don't we, as men, always hear about how women want their men to be more caring? well now it is time for the ladies to step up to the plate. the ladies should love a more available man, no?

Read my reply post...LOL That's what I said!!!!

I bought this program in early June for a friend who is a big tough building contractor. He can throw bags of cement half a mile ( not really) and he does have that macho issue. But I've seen him taken to his knees many times by panic and anxiety issues, too. The program arrived and I took it to him. He said he didn't need it. Okay. I was severely clinically depressed at the time, and never considered it would help. But I gave it a try. It works. It became my trusted guide on the journey out of depression, and I leaned on it really hard some days, nights, weeks.
My friend the macho man is still suffering anxiety and panic issues. He actually had anxiety so bad this summer some of his jobs suffered.
So, all I can say is men who admit they have a problem are the most courageous men around!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pecos

Man, can I ever relate to what your friend is going thru. Maybe once he sees how far you've come and will continue to go, he'll have a change of heart. Maybe after a while, have a private conversation with him about this and about your journey thru this. It's that stupid macho attitude.

yep i lost two relationships because the women wanted some one more confidant.doc says i am ery confidant. i just suffer from anxiety . looks the same but it is not.

I just started the program oct 2 feel the same way. (not to manly) but who cares if the program works for us. best of luck